Masquerade
by Angel of Androgyny
Summary: Sometimes we have to loose what is most precious to us to realize that we can't pretend anymore. MXM
1. Can you Keep a Secret?

_Masquerade_

_Sometimes things just don't get better for us. We try and try to be our true selves but the pressures from polite society make us only watered down versions..._

Chapter1: Can You Keep a Secret?

Right now I am pretending. I'm sitting here eating lunch with my friends and I am pretending to be all right.

I am pretending I don't feel your stare from across the lunchroom.

Pretending I don't remember what happened last night. Pretending I don't know what will probably happen when I leave this lunchroom alone.

My friends chatter washes over me, their talking about the same old same old allows me to become lost in my own thoughts which is never a good thing, because they always revolve around you.

You, who is the star of our school, the golden boy who everyone wants to either be but can't so they will take being friends with you and live their lives vicariously through yours.

Everyone except me. Or that's how I pretend to be in school.

I don't give two shits about you here.

Sometimes I wander if your little clique knew you could care less about them would it even matter? Probably not. That's just how devoted to you they are.

Sighing I pay more attention to the conversation only because Kagome hit me upside the head when I didn't answer her question. I was too busy thinking about you and your lakies to be paying the conversation any attention.

I say something and they all give me this weird stare. I definitely don't know what their talking about.

"Inuyasha are you feeling okay?" Kagome asks putting her hand on my forehead.

"Yeah man you feeling alright?" Miroku asks me his arms around Sango's waist. After about a million slaps to the face and five visits to the hospital Sango finally gave up. I think she figured if Miroku would go through all that to be with her it was worth giving him a chance.

Poor girl she doesn't know Miroku would go through the fires of Hell for _any_ piece of ass.

I shake my head and tell them I'm fine but they're still looking at me funny.

"Well maybe I am a little tired. I stayed up late last night." I said only telling them the half truth. They don't need to know I stayed up half the night and a little into the morning because of an insatiable brother. They'd really be giving me weird looks then.

"I think I'll go the nurse and lay down." I tell them grabbing my lunch tray with one hand to go dump it and leave the lunchroom.

Out of the corner of my eye I see you rise as well saying something to your lakies I can't quite here over the roar in the lunch room. I leave out a side door and into the court yard. I know you saw which way I left. And I know you'll follow.

I don't get five feet away from the lunchroom when I feel your breath against one of my ears.

"You're limping little brother." Your husky voice raps around me like I wish were your arms sending little shocks through me.

"Keh. Thanks to you ya bastard!"

You move closer to me and your breath is scalding my cheek now.

"But you seemed to like your punishment so much last night… Inuyasha. I couldn't help but give you a repeat performance this morning." Your lips are so close to my cheek now I can smell the minty scent of your toothpaste and nobodies around. Its maddening the way you play with me but we're not at home and I won't let you get to me here.

"Punishment? For what?" I ask.

"Letting that filthy wolf put his dirty paws all over you. You know better than to let others touch what is mine."

Another thing your lakies have no idea about. Your intense jealousy.

"Koga was just playing you know that." Everyone also knew that Koga's had a crush on me since about the first grade but has never done anything about it for some reason. That reason being Sesshomaru of course.

"Yes but you know I don't like anyone's scent all over you but mine and last night you completely reeked of the mangy wolf. I had to remedy it." You say nonchalantly while playing with a strand of my hair.

"So you keep me up all night and half the freaking morning??" I'm only yelling to cover up my nervousness. You're so close and we're out in the open. Anyone can see us.

"You didn't seem to mind so much last night." You stop directly in front of me and I'm forced to stop and look up with your thumb and forefinger on my chin.

"Why all the fuss now?"

My cheeks are blazing and I just know my ears are flat against my skull. Your eyes are so full of the lust that I've come to recognize, yet it feels so strange to see you looking at me with the same eyes here. I'm only used to them at home in my bedroom when all the lights are off and those eyes are glowing from within with an ethereal light.

This whole scene is actually strange since you are the popular one and I the nobody, naturally no one would expect us to talk to each other. We don't even have any classes together except lunch but that don't count. Even at lunch we sit as far away from each other as possible.

If anyone saw us now in this position, you leaning so close about to kiss me and I with tomato red cheeks and parted lips. There'd be no way we'd be able to play it off.

"Sesshomaru. Lunch is almost over and I really want to go to the nurse and lay down before class starts. You should go on.

Your group is probably worried about you."

"Not without a goodbye kiss." You say tilting my chin before swooping down for a kiss I hope is going to be quick but turns into a lingering caress.

Then you turn on the heal of your Italian shoes and leave me dazed in the middle of the courtyard.

"Dammit! Sesshomaru what if anyone saw!" I scream after you but you're already gone.

That's what I fear the most if anyone were to find out about us and it got around to father I can't bare to think what would happen to us.

Even this kind of thing isn't accepted in demon society anymore.

After the revolution humans completely took over and brainwashed demons to their thinking. It was horrible but it was either adapt or be killed. And the humans had guns demons may have awesome powers and all that jazz but you had to be up close to your enemies to do any real damage. Guns you could be a nice safe distance away and still take down as many demons as the tessaiga as long as you had enough bullets.

Needless to say no one follows the old ways of marrying your siblings to keep the bloodline pure. That was one of the first traditions to go after the revolution.

I ended up skipping my next period in the nurse's office. I was more tired than I realized and ended up sleeping throughout the rest of the day. Thankfully Miroku came by to hand me my homework and take me home.

The ride home was quiet up until we saw my brother's car parked in the driveway. Only my brother's car.

"See you tomorrow Miro!" I said getting out of the car.

"You gonna be alright?"

"Yeah I'll be fine Kaede-baba is here.

He gave me a look that said he wasn't quite sure but let it go and backed out of my driveway.

I sighed than walked up the driveway and into the house.

"I home!" I yelled entering the foyer of the house.

"Oh! Young master you startled me!" Kaede said a basket of laundry in her old arms.

"You need help with that?" I asked.

"You're so sweet but no I can handle it. Ye brother is up in his room studying so he should be in there awhile." Kaede said.

That meant I could get a few more hours of sleep before dinner and then Sesshomaru demanding the rest of my night.

"Thanks Kaede-baba!" I said running up the stairs to take a shower then crash until dinner.

"Don't sleep too long young master! Your father is bringing some important guests over so dinner is at seven o'clock sharp tonight!" She called up after me.

Dad had some cronies over tonight? Probably had nothing to do with me so I planned on skipping out. I need all the sleep I can get if tonight is going to be anything like last night.

* * *

**Disclaimer: I own Nothing. Inuyasha belongs to the wonderful Rumiko Takahashi.**

Oops I uploaded the unfinished chapter on accident before.


	2. Somethings not right

_Something's Not Right…_

**Okay before this chapter starts you have to reread the first chapter or it won't make sense. I accidentally uploaded the not so quite finished version of the first chapter .then I re-posted it after reading it in live preview. So go back and read it!**

_If we say nothing at all they will never know. If we act the way we all ways have, they will never suspect us they will never even think of the sins we commit every night. Keep this secret and we'll be together for all ways._

I didn't sleep as long as I planned and I forgot to close my bedroom door I could hear voices coming from downstairs. I turned and looked at the digital numbers on the clock on my nightstand and cursed. They read 7:30. I hadn't slept long but I'd slept long enough.

Dinner was probably on the table by now.

I scrambled out of bed and rushed down the stairs halfway to the dinning room I heard laughter and my name so I stopped to listen.

"Inuyasha? Where is the youngest son I keep hearing so much about?" It was a male voice strong and deep like my fathers' and brothers' but no where near as comforting. Actually it sent a nasty shiver down my spine.

"He's probably asleep. Lazy boy can't even do something as simple as be on time for dinner." The voice of my father sounded ashamed not angry and I had to bite my lip. I never shamed my father.

"It's not his fault father he after all is only a hanyo." Sesshomaru's voice sounded cool and unemotional like always. That was a good sign that he didn't mean what he said. Still the words hurt. I hated it when people brought up my parentage.

"Hanyo or no he is my son! And when I say be at the dinner table at seven o'clock I mean seven o'clock it is rude to keep guests waiting." My father was starting to sound furious. I can't imagine why it's not like this is the first time I skipped out on a dinner when he had important guests. He once told me he actually preferred it that I stayed in my room when old big time yokai came calling at our house. The old geezers didn't much like hanyo's.

"That's fine it's not like we actually came to see him in the first place. Although it would've been nice to see him. The way you describe him I bet he's a lovely creature." A female's voice sighed wistfully.

I was starting to think I should go back to my room now if there was going to be some girl hanging all over me the entire night. I didn't need Sesshomaru all over me like white on rice afterward.

"Only if you like the boorish and unkempt type." My brother said to the wistful female.

"Aww Sesshy-wesshy don't be so mean. If he looks anything like you, my beloved, he's bound to be adorable at least."

Wait hold up. Sesshy-wesshy? Beloved? Just what was going on?

"I am not adorable." My brother said. I could just see the look of annoyance on his face for being called such a thing. He got mad when I called him cute but adorable? That was just rich the lady didn't have much time left to live. She bastardized his name _and_ called him adorable. She was so dead.

"Yes you are. You're my adorable Sesshy-wesshy puppy." Then I heard a kissing sound.

Did…Did Sesshomaru and that heifer just…? No way!

I had to see this for myself. I walked the rest of the way to the dinning room and saw it for myself. The bastard and the bitch were kissing! Not that I could blame him the bitch was very pretty. She had short black hair up in a ponytail with two feathers sticking out of one side of the ponytail. Her face was pretty enough decorated with red eye shadow and ruby red lipstick. I couldn't see the color of her eyes since they were closed. Her breasts were ample and squeezed tight by her form fitting black blouse.

I hated her immediately. How dare she come into my house and kiss _my_ lover! Regardless if he was my brother or not!

They broke the kiss and the woman looked at me with odd crimson eyes. Even for yokai it was weird to have naturally colored red eyes.

I hated her even more for that. She was exotic and apparently curvaceous if her chest was anything to go by. And though I was exotic in other people's eyes Sesshomaru and I shared the same hair and eye color. Who would find the same thing you see in the mirror everyday exotic? And where she had fleshy curves and dips that would hug my brother to her to where they fit perfectly I had none and would never have them since I am male.

"Well well well. Look who decided to join us. Sesshy he's got the cutest little puppy ears on the top of his head!" The crimson eyed beastie said her claws latched to my brothers' arm.

"You've got a lot of apologizing to do puppy." My father said. "Keeping our guests waiting-"

"I heard what you said I know you weren't waiting for me and I aint apologizing to nobody!" I sure as hell wasn't apologizing to the minx attached to my brother.

"Inuyasha be careful of what you say this is my fiancée and her brother you are talking about!" Sesshomaru barked. I was taken aback. Sesshomaru never raised his voice at me. We may not talk much but when we did he never yelled at me. He always talked to me in the gentlest of voices. He even looked angry for real!

"That's alright Sessh he's probably a little grumpy from just getting up. Isn't that right puppy?" This bitch is starting to get on my nerves and she's my brother's fiancée?

"Father…I…don't understand." I asked surprised my voice didn't crack.

"If you were here earlier you'd know all about it. Now sit down and eat your dinner before it becomes any colder." My father said gesturing me to my normal seat beside him which was across from Sesshomaru.

I couldn't look at him. I couldn't deal with the lovey dovey chatter that was going on between him and the ogre. What was worse I was seated right next to the ogres brother who had the same creepy crimson eyes and hair except his was wavy instead of straight. The brother who later in the evening I found out name is Naraku tried to make a pass at me. He ghosted his hand under the table and rubbed my thigh in the middle of a conversation and I jumped. His hand trailed higher until it reached my groin and I couldn't help but react to his leisurely petting. I was blushing like mad but didn't stop him against my better judgment. I couldn't help it after being forced to watch thirty minutes of the happy couple swooning over each other and feeding each other bites of food I had to enact revenge somehow and I knew Sesshomaru could smell my arousal. He was such a possessive bastard he'd definitely get a rise out of this.

"Inuyasha if you don't mind take your self upstairs. Others would like _not_ to smell the pungent odor of your arousal at the dinner table." Sesshomaru said not even looking at me his attention was still only on the bitch. But everyone else's was on me.

"Inuyasha? Is it your time of majority?" My father asked.

I was embarrassed all eyes were on me and I was red with anger and embarrassment so I knew my face was entirely mottled.

"Eh…um. Excuse me." I left the table in a rush I could feel both Naraku's and Sesshomaru's gazes on me.

I ran up to my room and locked myself in and went to bed early. After that I didn't want to even accidentally hear what they said about me and the only way to accomplish that was to throw myself into oblivion.

I didn't expect Sesshomaru that night and was surprised when he came. Knocking down my door and bursting into my room in a demonic wave of fury.

"What have I told you about letting others touch what is mine??" He seethed his face a scant few inches from mine. He was so angry his fangs had elongated and the stripes on his cheeks became ridged.

"Have I not told you only I am to touch you? How dare you let that son of a bitch touch you and in front of me! Have you lost what little mind you posses hanyo??" He was over top of me in nothing but the robe he usually wore to my room on his nightly visits. Straddling my legs had the robe parted at the hem and I could see his manhood peeking through erect as it usually was at this time on night his arousal not at all deterred from his anger.

But tonight he would get no relief. I was just as angry as him!

"Who are you to preach to me about faithfulness when you were all over that big breasted bitch all night?" I yelled back in his face.

"Have you gone completely mental hanyo? What we do every night is beyond illegal and if we were to get found out we'd be killed or worse. It is imperative that I uphold pretenses." Sesshomaru yelled shaking me by my shoulders making my head bob and my teeth rattle.

"I was careless the other night and father caught me on my way to my room smelling of your arousal. He didn't say anything but I know he knows."

Dammit this is just what I was hoping wouldn't happen.

"Father knows?" He nodded in affirmative. "Wh-What's going to happen to us?" I asked afraid of the answer.

"Nothing as long as I go along with the betrothal to Kagura." So that was the bitch's name?

"No Sesshomaru! I don't like this." I begged.

"It's not about what you like hanyo. It's about my ability to keep you all to myself and I will do that even if I have to get married next year."

He said nuzzling into my neck grinding is arousal into my stomach.

"But what if I want you all to myself?" I asked.

He laughed.

"Hanyo. You never had me all to yourself."


	3. Dishonest Men

Chapter 3: "A Dishonest Man Makes Dishonest Children"

"_Sometimes brother…I just wish you would lie to me. I wish you would just be a little dishonest. Tell me the types of lies men tell their women to make them feel good. _

_Tell me you love me, even if it isn't true. I would rather hear a beautiful lie than the horrid truth." _

Laying here in this bed our combined releases coated on me in various places and dripping down my thighs. I wish the act was out of love false or true. But now I know that would be wishful thinking especially after what you told me.

I could've lived with your false love, now it seems I can't even have that.

You've doused my dream with your cold truth. Your freezing words like a bucket of icy water on my burning desires.

And yet even after you told me you were never mine, even after I found out you were engaged to that bitch, I still let you violate me I still let you take me and hold me give me false security and reassurance that how could you betray me with that woman if you hold me like this?

Soon you stiffen behind me and stretch your arms as you awaken. Even though my back is to you I can see in my minds eyes your eyes blinking the fogginess of euphoric sleep away, a lazy smug grin on your face as you look down on me knowing full well I am not asleep.

The bed dips as you climb off and I'm rewarded with a full view of your naked backside when you bend over and pick up your discarded robe from my floor.

You slip it on not even bothering to tie it before you walk back over to my bed and whisper something explicit in my ear then saunter out of my room.

You're gone.

The illusion of love lost and I let the tears finally fall. I silently cry until the predawn light hits my window and I stay in bed a little bit longer waiting for my alarm clock to go off before I finally get out of bed and get ready for another dreary, uneventful school day.

School was a blur and the entire day until my friends forced me out of my welcome haze.

"Inuyasha what's up? You haven't even tried to steal any of my food yet." Kagome said staring up at me with those chocolate eyes filled with worry.

"Yeah man that's so unlike you. You're starting to worry me."

I couldn't take this today.

The barrage of questions to my well being would just open the floodgates and I didn't want to cause a scene in school by breaking down in the lunchroom. So I ran.

"Sorry guys my minds just on this report I gotta finish up. You know last minute stuff. I'm gonna take off to the library."

They all stared at me for a bit various emotions playing across their faces before nodding and going back to eating their food and talking about the latest gossip getting fed around the school.

I walked out the cafeteria in a daze wandering the halls, no intention what so ever to go to the library.

I was fine this way the familiarity of the school allowing me to walk around with my mind blank and not worry about getting lost.

The only downside to walking like this is you run into people , and their most likely the last person you'd want to run into.

I turned a corner and ran into somebody. My forehead hit the guy's nose while we both toppled to the floor.

"Owww." My unconscious assaulted whined while rubbing his injured nose.

The pain from hitting my head on his nose knocked me out of my daze a little bit and I found myself in a most compromising position on the floor with Koga.

"Eh…Inuyasha are you alright?" asks the boy who's nose is about to bleed.

"I'd be better if your knee wasn't so close to my crotch" I growl finally starting to sound a little like my old self.

"Oh. Sorry." He said blushing while he scrambled off me to stand then held out his hand that I didn't take.

I picked myself off the floor and dusted off my school uniform before turning to leave Koga's voice stopped me.

"Ano Inuyasha-kun. I was wandering if you would like to go to the movies with me or something. Nothing serious."

Any other day I would've immediately said no, but what the hell? I thought.

It wasn't like I owed any loyalty to my bastard brother.

"Sure. You know my phone number?" I heard my self ask.

He shook is head no and I reached into my back pocket and got out. He looked so happy when I took his hand to write my number down at least I could provide happiness for some one else. Maybe this'll be alright. I thought while writing my number on the palm of his hand.

I was starting to feel better making someone happy for once and it really sort of touched me that Koga liked me even though I was a hanyo. I decided to give him a little peck on the cheek for pulling me out of my dour mood.

"What was that for?" He asked.

I shrugged, "Just felt like it." The bell rang and I turned to leave and saw you starring right at us. It may not have shown on your face but I knew you were furious and I thought maybe I shouldn't have done that but the damage was done and I knew instinctively there would be hell to pay.


	4. Love of a Psychotic Brother

Chapter 4: The Love of a Psychotic Brother

_Pedaling through_

_The dark currents_

_I find an accurate copy_

_A blue print_

_Of their pleasure_

_In me….-Bjork _

I squared my shoulders and lifted my chin knowing I'd have to pass you and hoping my confidence in you not making a scene since we were in school held up, but the fact that we were alone in the hall way made me feel a little nervous.

I passed you slowly and your hand shot out and grabbed unto my braid I had tied my hair in that morning then dragged me down the hall with it like an impromptu leash.

You kicked open the door to the nearest boys' restrooms giving the occupants the same bone numbing glare I usually find myself under, causing them to make a hasty exit before locking the door and throwing me against it.

"We need to stop meeting like this dear brother. Me against you while you have the stench of someone else covered all over you."

I knew it would be no use trying to tell you it was an accident. You were beyond pissed, your eyes flashing and fangs growing longer with the swirl of heavy negative emotions cracking in your aura.

And I don't understand why?

I am nothing but a nightly romp but still the smell of someone else on my skin brings out such intense emotions?

"I don't understand." I hear myself whisper and your ranting stops but for a moment so you can look at me with a confused yet angry glare.

"Why can't you just leave me alone? Why can't you just be with Kagura and only her and let me move on?"

"I explained the reason last night hanyo," your voice is dangerously low and I know I should stop now but I can't help it. This has rolled around in my head for long enough it was time for it to come out.

"Fucking hell Sesshomaru we're brothers! We can't keep doing this! We can't be together," as much as it pained me to say it, it was true. Our relationship was insane.

"We can't be together like this forever and not get caught! You told me so yourself that father may already know. Fuck if he didn't know already it's bound to come to his attention. He's a dog demon. _Dog _demon. Shit he could probably smell if the moon were made of cheese!"

"I explained the reason last night." You repeat.

"Oh yeah being someone's fuck body is _real_ rewarding!"

"That is quite enough!" you growl dangerously close to my neck. You lean in forward your nose is nuzzling that place that you know makes me weak.

"I can't do it. I can't do this anymore!" I force out before I succumb to your actions.

"What?" Your hands on my shoulders tighten to where I can feel the claws digging into the skin and your breath is so hot on my neck it makes me want to bend my neck to the side and give you more access, "What did you say Inuyasha?" you repeat needlessly. I already heard you the first time.

"I said I can't do this anymore asshole! I'm going to the movies with Koga."

Your eyes narrow and I can almost feel your fury. The hairs at the back of my neck are starting to stand on end. I just know you're going to snap and lash out at me then go find Koga and beat him into the bloody pulp you've always secretly wanted to.

But you don't.

You don't do anything but release me and unlock the doors.

Not looking at me you whisper with restrained fury.

"You will regret this."

The look of calm control on your face frightens me a bit. The only outward knowledge I have that your pissed is the incessant twitching of your left eye.

"No I don't bastard and don't even _**think **_of sneaking into my room anymore!" I yell.

"Oh I won't. That is one thing I most definitely won't do. Have no fear of that." You say voice still guarded and not looking at me.

The bell finally rings and you gracefully stomp out of the bathroom and even slam the door gracefully as only you can do. Only causing me to become more angry.

"Presumptuous bastard. Thinking I'd just idly stand by why he plays house with that bitch!" I yell punching the wall before leaving the bathroom to go to my own class.

XxX

The entire week was hell and I was surprised that I actually anticipated my weekend date with Koga. As weird as that sounds it isn't as weird as all the other shit that's been taking place.

Now you and I seem to really hate each other and instead of quietly ignoring each other like we used to do we've been fighting in earnest lately.

Never physically though. No, when we fought physically it was you teasing me about what would happen in the night to come.

But now we only verbally snap at each other. And you've been bringing the succubus over every night and her weird ass brother just _has_ to tag along with her.

Every night I have to stomach the sugary lovey dovey chit-chat that goes on between you two and every night that bastard gets bolder and bolder.

Touching me whenever he's close to me, although they aren't blatant I know you notice it. And it's starting to piss me off but I allow it since it pisses you off.

Every night since he's been here I know you've been coming to my room. Never opening the door and stepping inside though, since you vowed not to, but I know you want to. I hear your ragged breathing on the other side of my door until you curse and I hear you stomping down the hall back to your room.

I even walked to the door and almost turned the knob a few times. 'Cause as pathetic as I know this sounds, I miss you.

Not your attitude! No I'd never miss that, but the way you held me tenderly at night even though in the morning your words stung me to my soul. I miss those bittersweet moments.


	5. A Wolf's Conquest

_On the surface simplicity_

_But the darkest pit in me_

_Its pagan poetry_

_Pagan poetry…-Bjork_

Chapter 5: A Wolf's Conquest

Friday morning I woke up a little happier. I couldn't wait for my little friendly date with Koga later on.

I got up when my alarm went off, got dressed then went downstairs to grab a piece of toast and jelly that Kaede left out for me every morning knowing that's the only thing I eat for breakfast. Nibbling on my toast I grabbed my backpack from the stairs and walk out the door while you were coming down the stairs to get your coffee and fruit.

I don't know how you can drink that stuff especially black the way you like it but I guess if you can easily treat me the way you do you can easily drink the most rancid of things.

Funny when you taste so sweet.

Shaking my head my toast in my mouth I go outside to wait for Miroku who drives me, Kagome and Sango to school since he's the only one of us with a car.

When we get to school I see Koga in the hallway on my way to first period and he gives me this goofy grin with a thumbs up. I guess making sure we're still on for tonight. I get the urge to come up to him and whisper, "Of course we are," into his ear than leave him standing shell shocked in the middle of the hallway with a few students looking at me with weird looks on their faces.

I know they're bound to talk but I'm not caring. I'm just grateful to Koga that he's going to get me out of the house and away from you and your insults and dirty stares, if only for a little while.

"Inuyasha! What's this business about you and Koga going out?" Kagome demands of me. Its lunchtime and Miroku promptly chokes on the juice box he's drinking.

"You're what man?" he asks a little blue from temporarily cutting off his own air supply.

I continue leisurely eating my Ramen while the entire table stares at me. I even see out of the corner of my eye that you're staring at my table too.

"I don't know what you guys are talking about." I say still eating my noodles.

"Just now when I was in line I heard these girls say how you kissed Koga in the ear or something, and how it would would be so 'kawaii' if you two were going out." Kagome says pushing the subject. I can feel her staring holes into my forehead.

"I was just telling Koga how I was looking forward to tonight." I sigh, not that it's any of her business, but we've been friends long enough to where just because I'm a demon won't stop her from bashing my skull in until she gets what she wants. If she doesn't do it physically she'll mentally torture me until I spill my guts… Why am I friends with her? I think to myself.

"Ah-ha! So you are going out!" Kagome yells. I see you start to get up from your seat across the lunchroom a scowl of murderous intent on your face. It almost makes me smile.

"No. We're just going to the movies later on. Not that it's any of your business." I say finishing up my food and getting up to go dump my tray and leave.

I have an English report to finish up that I really want to get done before tonight so I won't have anything to worry about while I'm out with Koga.

Leaving the lunchroom and all its chatter I walk down the insanely long high school hallways to my locker to get my backpack with my unfinished paper in it then head to the library.

Turning down the hall were my locker is I see you leaning against the locker next to mine looking calm and cool like you always do, but I know you have to be feeling anything but after hearing that conversation.

"What do you want Sesshomaru?" I ask curtly when I get to my locker and turn in the combination trying to ignore how close you are to me. It's been almost a week and your newest cologne curls around my nose along with your natural scent, it makes my mouth water.

"Don't do anything stupid, hanyo." You breathe into my ear.

When did you get behind me? Not good I'm starting not to care.

Your hands are on either side of my locker and I can't get it open without pulling my body back and that brings my body dangerously close to yours. Your familiar scent is so close to me and I'm forcibly reminded of how much I missed it this past week.

I can feel you breathing, your chest rapidly rising and falling and your delicious heat is against my back. I'm trembling, fighting with myself not to turn and kiss those vicious lips.

"Don't do anything stupid." You whisper again then turn and leave. With your warmth gone I'm suddenly cold and aching for you to come back. I angrily pull my backpack out of my locker then slam it, the loud sound rings throughout the empty hallway.

"Dammit Sesshomaru!"

XxX

On the ride home Miroku and the gang wouldn't stop teasing me about my "date" with Koga tonight.

"Remember, Inuyasha no further than first base on the first date or he'll never call you." Miroku teases as I get out of the car. I flip him off on my way into the house.

When I'm inside I run upstairs, throw my backpack in my room than strip out of my school clothes, grab my robe and towel then head for the bathroom to take a shower. After that I go into my room and try to find something to wear. If anyone had come in my room they would've seen clothes thrown all over the place while I looked for something decent and fresh. I choose to wear kind of baggy black jeans and a long-sleeved blue t-shirt since the weather is getting chilly, a cross necklace and I put my hair in one long plait down my back and plain black tennis shoes. I grab my wallet off my desk and head downstairs when I hear Koga honking.

"So…what'dya wanna see?" Koga asks when we arrive at the movie theater.

"I've been wanting to see that American robot movie." I say unbuckling my seatbelt and getting out of the car.

"That sounds cool." Koga says his t-shirt bunching against his muscles as he gets out of the car. I cannot help but to stare.

"Let's see that one, I heard it was pretty tight," Koga says standing close to me as we walk to the ticket counter. It was a little awkward he kept glancing at me and his hand started to twitch.

"Two for _Transformers_." He says into the mic.

"That'd be sixteen dollars." The girl behind the counter says she kind of looked like someone that goes to our school.

I pull out my wallet to pay but Koga stops me.

"No I got it," Koga says.

"Koga, my dad's the chairmen of the most successful company in the country and gives me a lofty allowance. I'd feel bad if you paid for me." I say a little nervous of how this looks. Koga's looking a little too far into this but, I guess what I did earlier doesn't help things much.

"Naw. It's alright. You can buy us the snacks."

I just shrug. Looks like he isn't gonna let me win.

After we get our tickets torn and shown which way the movies in, we walk up to the snack bar. I'm not really big on junk food so I get us a large bag of popcorn and a large drink to share while he gets some Hot Tamales.

"How can you eat that?" I ask not even hiding the disgust in my voice when he pops one in his mouth.

"Have you ever tried one?" Koga asks throwing another in the air and catching it in his mouth. I have to say I'm a little impressed he can do that while we're walking.

"No. I've never wanted to. I don't do sweets."

"Can't judge it till you try it." Koga says holding out one of the cylinder shaped candies to me.

"No thanks." I'm not about to eat that.

"Come on they're not really sweet. Just try one and if you don't like it I won't bug you about it anymore." He says waving the candy in front of my face like that's gonna make it more appealing to me.

I roll my eyes.

"Promise it won't kill me." I ask looking at the candy warily.

"Promise." Koga says stepping forward and pushing the candy he held between his thumb and forefinger between my parted lips.

Some of his finger went in with it and I accidentally nibbled it while biting down on the candy.

"Eh. Sorry." I say, I really didn't mean to do that.

"Naw, it's alright." He clears his throat a little before asking, "So how is it?"

I take a moment to examine the candy in my mouth. He was right it isn't really sweet but cinnamony and spicy.  
I like spicy food.

"It's alright." I say still chewing.

"Ha! Found a candy you'll eat!" I just shrug again.

When we reached our destination the theater was packed.

"Damn! We should have gotten here earlier." Koga curses.

There are only a few seats left and most of them aren't anywhere near each other.

Luckily we find two seats in the middle of the back row in the theater.

We are sitting by an adult couple and a group of kids that look like they're in the seventh grade.

"I hope they're not too noisy when the movie starts." Koga says getting situated in his seat.

I don't have to worry about that since I'm on the other side of him away from the group of kids.

"I just hope this couple next to me doesn't start making out,"

Soon the lights dim and the movie starts. I was surprised Koga didn't try anything wasn't this the guy who'd had a crush on me for as long as I could remember? Though halfway through the movie he did put his arm around my chair.

I gave him an arch look.

"I'm not a girl Koga." I said ignoring it then going back to watch the movie.

When the movie was over I was grateful of two things. One the most the couple did next to me was snuggle up together and two all Koga did was keep arm around my chair.

"So how did you like the movie?" Koga asks as we exit the theater and head back to his car.

"I liked it. It was really faced paced and the special effects and action scenes were awesome." I just knew my geeky side was showing but that didn't seem to bother Koga. He was just as enthusiastic about the movie as I was.

"Yeah I know! Man I'm hungry though." He said his stomach growling loudly.

"How can you be hungry when you ate a whole box of candy and more popcorn than I did?"

"I'm a demon, high metabolism and all that." He shrugs getting into his car.

I get in after him and buckle up.

"So where do you wanna go?" He asks.

"I really don't care just as long as the food is good."

"I know the perfect place." Koga says peeling out of the parking lot.

Soon we pull up to a pizzeria. I've never had pizza before so I just let Koga order for us.

He ordered two large pepperonis and a Hawaiian delight.

The food was delicious and we talked the entire time. About friends, drama regular teenage stuff. I also learned a lot about Koga and we ended up staying until closing telling each other our life stories and even then we didn't leave until we were kicked out.

Koga drove me back home and I look at the clock on his dash board and gape at the time.

"Is that thing accurate?" I ask dreading his answer.

"Yep."

I groan like a wounded animal. I don't have a curfew but after this night I'm sure to.

"One o'clock aww man my dad's gonna kill me! I had fun Koga but I gotta jet!" I say while hurriedly taking off my seatbelt.

"Yeah me too, we should definitely do this again sometime." He says putting his hand on my wrist keeping me in the car.

I turned to him, "Uh Koga I gotta go. You don't know my dad he's liable to be waiting for me with a butcher knife."

"That's okay if you're gonna die lets prolong it a little while," he says leaning over and I know he's gonna kiss me I just pray I don't like it.

His lips brush against mine and it feels good. Too good.

I'm immediately hot and clinging to him. I sigh and he dips his tongue into my mouth and I clamp my lips over it and suck, wringing a groan from him. His hands coil in my hair holding my head tight to him as his mouth slants over mine. My hips buck and I nearly rack myself on the fucking gear shift.

This is bad, my porch lights flick on and I don't care. One of Koga's hands finds its way under my shirt and starts doing wondrous things to my nipples and I'm lost. His tongue in my mouth feels so good, but this is bad. Didn't I already think that? My brain is mush and my groin is hard, never a good combonation. But Gods it felt so GOOD!

His hands move into the front of my pants rubbing against me through my jeans, and I climb over the fucking joy stick and sit directly in his lap. He unbuttons my jeans and the cool air hitting my cock makes it jerk. I can't breath but his lips move to my neck in time and I don't have to break the moment by telling him. This is bad, we're about to fuck in the front seat of his car in front of my house and still I'm not caring. Its been too long and I want it too bad to care who with. He runs his thumb over the tip making me cry out and cling to him.

"Gods Inuyasha. Do you know how much I've thought of you with me like this?" He pumps his hand, "How I've thought of what the little noises you make would sound like?"

I can't concentrate on a damn thing he's saying but his voice is husky and sounds sexy as hell. I don't care what he says as long as he keeps on doing what he's doing.

"I never took you for an uke though. You're so badass at school, I thought _I_ would be the one you'd top." He laughs a little bit and the vibrations from his chest feels good against mine "Oh well this is better anyways."

I need this. I don't want this feeling to stop. I want Koga to grab me and lay me down in the backseat and do all the things I know he's been thinking about doing to me since he hit puberty. I want to just give in to it but I can't. I can't let him have me, cause I know it'll bring you out of this little chit you're in and you'll kill him. You'll destroy Koga for touching me and I can't have that. I need Koga. I need him, to talk to, to have him touch me tenderly like you never did. I don't want this to end but it has to for this feelings sake.

"…Koga…" His name came out as a moan passing my lips and that only fired him up more he pulled my jeans down lower and started playing with my ass.

I cleared my throat we couldn't do it. We couldn't!

"Koga!" I yell he looks at me dazed, red and confused, "We've got to stop. We're in front of my house."

He looks around like he's forgotten where he was and his eyes widen in recognition.

"Inuyasha I'm so sorry," he says taking in my appearance, "I… dammit! I didn't mean for it to go this far."

I grudgingly got off his lap and crawled back over into my seat and fixed my pants and shirt, though he watched me hungrily Koga kept his distance.

"Naw it's cool. I didn't really want you to stop either. Its just we're in front of my house. Another place maybe." I say getting out of the car and waving as he pulls out of my driveway.

I take a deep breath of the cool night air clearing my head and I turn to walk to the front door. I know someone's up when I reach the porch and I see that the foyer light is on. I open the door and take off my shoes, keeping my eyes on the floor until I turn and see you. Blocking my way to the hall where the stairs are, looking dishelmed in your black silk button down shirt and slacks, looking anything but calm.

* * *

Okay some of you may be wandering about the song lyrics at the beginning of the last two chapters. I really think those lyrics really describe the story so far especially the ones at the top of this chapter.

Sorry for the long wait on these chapters. Please don't lynch me I will definitely get this story finished. Split I'm not so sure when the next chapter for it will be posted but I will finish it... eventually.

Love you guys thanks for reviewing, again sorry for the long wait.

See you in the next chapter.


	6. Internal Conflict

_Brother…DEAREST brother, why do you insist on hurting yourself so?_

Chapter 6: Internal Conflict

I want to scream!

I want to go and rip apart that disgusting wolf I can smell all over you.

But I won't.

No…Never that.

For if I do that dearest brother.

The game has ended and the cards will be all out on the table.

And you have a lofty hand.

No more bluffing….

You walk into the house and stop dead in your tracks after seeing me.

What? What is it Inuyasha that you see in my face that makes those wide innocent golden rod eyes widen so?

Dear brother…. What have you done?

xXx

It's suddenly cold in the house and the coffee you're drinking smells horrible and I can smell it all the way over here.

The stench is making me edgy. You just sit there contemplating the dark placid contents of your mug.

Move do something brother!

I know you know and I don't care what you think, I hope you're hurting and if you go psycho and try and attack Koga… I'll kill you.

I'm through being your love sick puppy while you go gallivanting and get _engaged_.

I'm through.

You get up, the sound of the metal chair screeching against the linoleum floor grates against my ears. My back stiffens as you come forward toward me.

Your head is slightly bent down when you stop in front of me. Those silver bangs hiding your eyes from me. You come closer so close I can smell the coffee on your breath and you block my path with your body crowding in on mine. Your arms like steal bars on either side of me.

What are you gonna do _dear brother_? Hit me?

xXx

Don't look at me with those eyes Inuyasha. Those defiant eyes that burn rage. They're scorching my soul.

They make me want to cry out and hold you. Make me want to ask for your forgiveness for I too have done wrong.

Inuyasha you have the eyes of a vengeful angel…please don't look at me with those eyes!

Don't you know everything I do, I do for you??

The distance I put between us, even the engagement with Kagura.

All lies.

Loving you is dangerous my precious Inuyasha.

All I can allow myself is a taste of your wondrous body; I can't allow myself to love you.

You are mine.

That's all you are a possession that I can not let go of.

And until I do you only belong to me.

Your heart.

Your soul.

Your body.

All mine.

How _dare_ you let another touch it!

xXx

Energy is cracking between us and your bangs are still covering your eyes from my sight.

Gods Sesshomaru hit me and get it over with! I know that is what you want to do. The arms encaging me are trembling and I think I hear a small laugh escape from your lips.

Then you lift your head up and stare into my face, directly into my eyes. You say nothing for log moments then you reach up attack my lips for a painful kiss.

Your lips are hard and urgent against mine. Nothing like Koga's his lips were soft and sweet taking there time. Your arms slide down the side of my body and grip my waist. Your lips are slanting against mine.

I keep mine shut. No matter how much I have missed this I refuse.

I'm through.

I've made up my mind.

No more.

You're getting annoyed by my lack of a response and the hands around my hips tighten and bring me closer to your body.

You're aroused but you won't find your relief with me tonight. That's what your fiancé's for.

But I forgot since we have been long time lovers you can play my body to any tune you wish.

Your lips get softer and you gently run your tongue over my bottom lip before nipping it with a fang and my legs start to get weak.

"Ungh." Damn my traitorous body! I can feel your smirk against my lips as you delve your tongue inside my depths then retreat doing this over and over again until I suck on your tongue.

I'm hot again. Your waist is moving against mine and my head is light.

I need oxygen.

You back away from me and just stare with a smug smile on your face.

Like you've proven something.

You've proven nothing!

So what my body still wants you? I'm a guy I can get off to anyone touching me like that!

You've proven nothing.

You nod your head then turn your back on me and walk up the stairs to your room. Leaving your coffee cup on the table.

It's just me and that infernal stench as I lean against the front door and try and get my legs to work.

**I am sooooooooooo sorry! I have major writers block! So um sorry again if this chapter is kinda off. Well it is different. For one it's got some of Sesshomaru's pov in the beginning. I don't know what I was thinking but writing the beginning like that but it did push me out of my writers block sorta kinda. Sesshomaru is now my new muse I suppose…not really.**

**K any ways thanks for reading and reviewing. See ya in the next chapter.**

**Angel**


	7. Further Away

_You've been given…love. You have to trust it…_

_-Bjork (All is Full of Love)_

Chapter 7: Further Away

The next day at school was interesting to say the least. We were still avoiding each other like always. Not that I thought our situation would change after that weird thing last night. I don't even know what to call it or how to explain it. I just know that now we're definitely done with each other.

Through.

And I can't say if I'm sad or happy about it. 

Koga's everywhere though.

In the same bathroom as me in every hallway I'm walking down.

He's even started to sit with me at lunch. Miroku continues to choke on random juice boxes.

He's affectionate too. Holding my hand and bringing me stuff.

Not that I'm complaining or trying to stop him, it actually makes me kind of happy and I find that I really don't want to stop him.

I like this with him. Not that I know what it is yet but it feels good.

Though I can't go out with him again any time soon, dad was totally pissed after staying out so long with him the other day.

xXx

That night was another one of those dinners where the siblings from Hell join us. Lovely, especially when father likes to berate me at these dinners. Can't the old guy find another time to do this and another place, a place where your gold digging fiancé _isn't _in attendance?

Father clears his throat dabs at his lips with the cloth napkin that was in his lap before turning to me.

"Inuyasha. What is this I hear about you staying out all hours of the night with a wolf yokai?" 

_Great. _Just when I thought dinner was going good for once. I was enjoying my meal the perv was keeping his hands to himself and the two of you looked to be in some kind of spat. Like I care as long as you both were quiet and not owey gowey eyed over each other.

I sigh and place my chopsticks to the side.

"It was nothing dad. I just went to the movies with a friend and we lost track of the time." 

Dad narrows those golden eyes that are just like yours but more like mine at me. The similarity sends a cold streak down my spine. We haven't met eye to eye in weeks and to be confronted with it through our father's eyes. I really hated our exotic similarities sometimes… 

"And what were you two doing to loose all sense of time, little brother?" I put my fork down and do a little eye narrowing of my own. We need no input from the sidelines!

"Not that it's any of your business we were talking." Kind of. Your eyebrows disappear behind your bangs. You shake your head and go back to eating well picking at your food. Now that I notice you haven't put one fork full in your mouth all night.

Father clears his throat and chooses to drop the subject. He was never real good with the whole interrogating us thing anyways. That was more your forte.

You used to do it all the time just to watch me squirm. 

Dinner passed by fairly quickly after that and when dinner was over you and your fiancé went into some secluded part of the house while dad went Gods knows where and me in one of my own little moods went up to sit on the roof.

It's been a while since I've been up here I forgot how good it felt to be alone with nothing but the cool night breeze to caress my skin and not my lust crazed yokai brother.

I hear foot steps and the shingles on the roof creaking and I turn around to face the legs of none other than Naraku.

The succubus' pervert of a brother.

"Hello puppy. Mind if I join you?" He says hands in his expensive pants pockets as he looks at me with unguarded lust in his eyes from the doorway.

Who in the Hells does this guy think he is calling me puppy? But oh well, I don't say anything. I wanna see what his next move will be.

He takes this as an invitation and sits down close to me.

Way to close to me, like our thighs are touching close.

"Beautiful night." He says. His voice is low and gravely like he's gargling rocks or something. It's not too bad but it's not what I'm used to. 

I turn to look at him. He's wearing a deep silk purple button up dress shirt with a black blazer over it and black slacks. He wasn't wearing shoes but his socks were black also. When I first met him I thought his hair was black but now that I see that it's more of a dark, dark chocolate with undertones of black. The waist length stuff curling behind his back in the slight breeze.

"What do you want?" I ask not up for small talk at all.

"Well I thought you'd know the answer to that by now." He turns to me his full lips kicked up in a devilish smirk.

One of my eyebrows goes up at that.

"What?" I ask. Word games have never been my strong suit you would know that. 

Naraku leans in closer so close I can smell the lime sherbet on his breath that the servants served for our dessert.

"I want you little puppy," He whispers before kissing me on my cheek close to the edges of my lips before licking me there before pulling back and looking at my expression that I know has got to be shock written all over my face.

We both hear footsteps step onto the roof and we both turn to see you. Your silver moonbeam hair flying in the wind making me remember times when that hair used to spill over your shoulders and all over my body as you held yourself over me. You glared down at Naraku saying curtly.

"Your sister is waiting at the door ready to leave. I trust you know your way out."

Naraku nodded getting up then holding out a hand to help me up which like an idiot I took it. He pulled me up too fast and I stumbled right into that trickster's chest and you watched the whole thing pass by with barely controlled fury in those fiery eyes.

Naraku still holding me as he addressed you.

"Of course and you have been such a kind host to me and my sister." Naraku said before turning to me and bending down slowly for more your benefit than mine, to whisper in my ear.

"I will see you soon my puppy." Before he slipped something in my hand walking away bowing at you before leaving to go downstairs. You glare at me and I ignore you looking at the small piece of cardboard in my hand his business card I suppose.

"Give me that." You say suddenly standing directly in front of me. I finally look at you and back away.

"No it's mine he gave it to me not you." I say holding the card closer to me. Your eyes narrow dangerously and I sweat I can see flecks of red swimming in the irises.

"Inuyasha I am serious give it to me." You hold your clawed hand out for the card. A hand I have let violate me and do all sorts of things to me for as long as I can remember.

"Why?" I find myself asking.

"Because I am trying to protect you from him." You say. That kind of surprises me that you would let something like that slip. I just shake my head.

"Yeah right." I don't believe you. Maybe a few weeks ago I would have before you pulled the wool from my eyes and showed me the real you. The you who has only been using me all these years. I walk away from you to the stairs then turn back.

"You know Sesshomaru. You're a real bastard and the only one I ever needed protecting from was you." I leave you standing there with a stunned look on your face before closing the door to the roof and going down the stairs to my room. I'm really tired all of a sudden. 

xXx

_Woot woot! Finally got this out! Sorry no more looks into Sessy's mind, yep that was a once in a life time thing for this story and actually I'm thinking about changing that chapter cause after all this is supposed to be in Inuyasha's point of view. So yeah anyways. Sorry for the extremely long delay and I hope you liked and dun du dahh! Naraku's starting to mac on our little Inu! See ya next chappy._

_Angel. _


	8. Things aren't Really that Simple

"On the surface simplicity…"

"_On the surface simplicity…"_

_Bjork-Pagan Poetry_

A/N: Okay all my readers I have totally redid this story from this chapter onward because I had NO idea where I was going with the old plot so I just deleted it and started over from Ch.8….

Chapter 8: Things aren't really that Simple.

I really wander what people see when they look at us. Do they see a perfect, albeit demon, family that's filthy rich and seemingly has no cares in the world?

You make excellent grades and you are the perfect son doing all the right things and you're even going to be taking over the family business when you finish college.

Perfect.

Pristine.

Unmarred.

You are the ultimate being in everyone's eyes. The golden boy.

No one sees that under that façade, and it is a façade I don't care what you've convinced yourself, of cleanliness you are dirty. So dirty.

You are the ultimate fallen angel and if people looked close enough they could see it.

You're beautiful in a way that is romantic and haunting. Alluring. You look just the part of a once heavenly being that fell from grace.

And you have, you've fallen so far my dearest precious, _perfect_ brother. You've fallen right into my bed. My pristine brother with all your pretenses of purity you have done the thing that no one will forgive you of.

What is the verse again?

"_If thy hand offend thee than cut it off."_

And that's exactly what you've done or tried to do. You've tried to cut me off. Found you a nice _female _to be with and I see it, I see it in your eyes how much you hate it, and her.

Dearest brother I think the greatest sin is denying yourself.

XxX

XxX

XxX

Dreams, I hate dreams. I hate them because you're always there in my subconscious mind teasing me with how things should be in reality. But they aren't and they'll never be.

Last night I had a very disturbing dream of you. Your shining hair was spilled over your shoulders onto a bed of crimson and your face was upturned. I was looking down at you from a vantage point that I'd never been in before.

I was on top and you were on the bottom. I know you would slay me for even thinking such thoughts but it was a dream and men scarcely have control over their dreams.

It disturbed me enough that I'm still thinking about it now, the next day at lunch. Those images of you submissive and underneath me, so very unlike the Sesshomaru I know, flashing behind my eyes as I try to eat.

It pricks my curiosity something fierce it makes me wonder if you'll really moan like that and beg me to do the things to your body that you have done to mine. I know that curiosity will never be assuaged not only would you never in a million years let me top, but now we are not even lovers anymore.

No more trips to my room.

No more nightly romps that last until the early morning rays of the sun shine through the curtains.

Again it makes me wonder what people would think if they knew how very much defiled you are and it brings a little smile to my lips that only I have seen the real you. Everyone else gets the fake even that hag you're insistent on marrying.

Koga saunters up to my groups table with his lunch tray looking ridiculous with a smug smile on his lips. The gang doesn't even look surprised when he plops himself in front of me next to Kagome, he's been sitting with us so much that they've either accepted him as a new friend or they just don't notice him.

"What's got that goofy grin on your face wolf?" I say as he starts eating shaking his head with the grin still in place.

"Nothing, nothing." He shakes his head.

"Oh spill it out that smile hasn't budged since you sat down now spill it."

He slowly puts his sandwich down then wipes his mouth with a napkin before talking.

"Well if you must know my little hanyo friend I've got an in to that new club downtown."

I'm not really one with keeping up with things like this but Kagome sure was and her head whipped around so fast that I was surprised it didn't pop off.

"What did you say??" She basically screeched, "Did you say you had a way to get into club Bliss??"

"Yeah I did." Koga said that grin coming back.

"You have GOT to get me in too!" She was hanging all over Koga now, eyes big and brown and scary.

"Okay, okay you can come with us just unlatch yourself from me." Koga said trying to pry his arm out of her death squeeze.

"You here that Sango and Miroku we're all going to club _Bliss _tonight!"

And just like that they started planning our night on the town.


	9. Waking Up

"_I'm the fucking Buddha this is enlightenment"_

_~Bjork, Alarm Call_

Chapter 9: Waking up

Miroku beeped his horn for what felt like the thousandth time but I was still kept hostage in my room as Koga and Kagome fussed over me.

"Koga what shirt do you think would look good with these jeans?" Kagome asked holding up a pair of jeans she'd just dug out of a dark corner in my closet.

"Maybe that graphic tee with the skeleton bunny on it?" Koga answered absentmindedly he was still in my closet digging around for a pair of shoes.

"Guys?" I said watching them raid my closet my heart filling with trepidation at every article they picked off the hangers that were in the far back, for a reason.

"Oh Koga you're a genius!" Kagome screeched over me, at least I tried…

A few seconds later Koga and Kagome came out of my closet, Kagome was holding the dreaded pants and the neon green graphic tee with a black skeleton bunny on it. And Koga was holding a pair of converse with bright colors splashed all over them. Like a psychedelic skittle had exploded all over it.

I shuddered.

"You guys I'm already dressed." Kagome just made a sound of disgust.

"Psssh. That is hardly dressed for a club. School maybe. Here I'll just set these here and meet you out in the car when you're done. Come on Koga." She scoffed at my blue jeans a kind of new pair of converse and a plain black tee shirt. My hair was up in a pony tail my forelocks hanging at the side of my face.

"What?" I asked. Kagome just rolled her eyes.

"No I think I'll stay here a few moments. Gotta make sure he puts it all on." Koga's eyes glinted evilly, giving me the feeling that he'd put the clothes on me by force if he had to. Ha! The flee bag could try.

"Oh good thinking Koga!" Kagome screamed before bouncing out my room door.

When the door was shut the crafty wolf turned to me with an expectant look.

I looked again at the outfit, I hadn't worn so much color in a long time, those were from the days before this mess between you and I started. Back when I was happy and knew what I wanted or at least thought I knew…

"You're an evil man." I grumbled as I snatched up the clothes and stomped to the bathroom. Better to get this over with quickly.

"Wolf actually!" Koga yelled as I slammed the bathroom door. I could hear the bastard laughing from behind the wood.

In the bathroom I shucked off my clothes grumbling about stupid wenches and their mangy wolf boy companions. First I put on the pants which were a little tight; they were a pair of black skinny jeans that Kagome had talked me into getting and were a hairsbreadth close to suffocating my junk. I pulled them down and a little below my hips sagging them a bit. Then the shirt it fit alright the arms which were short sleeves were a bit tight around my triceps it hugged to my chest pretty snuggly and showed off the muscles in my chest and stomach. The little bunny thing in the middle was going to look like it was dancing whenever I moved tonight. I kept my hair up in the ponytail not about to allow those two to change my whole outfit then walked out the door.

Looking at Koga I already knew he liked what he was seeing.

"I could molest you right now." Were Koga's breathy words of approval I just rolled my eyes and walked past him.

"Don't even try it wolf." I flipped Koga off as I kept on walking toward my room door. I didn't even want to go to this stupid club. The quicker we get the night started the faster I'll be able to come back home and be comatose under my covers.

Koga's arms were around me before I could walk all the way out of my room door. His warm breath tickling the right side of my neck. My whole body went rigid it's been so long since any one has touched me I really don't want to give Koga the wrong impression by melting into his arms.

"You know you want me to. After all we never got to finish what was started in my car." His hands start playing with my stomach and chest. Combined with his breathy words against my skin it's getting harder not to give in.

"Koga…" I start but he just kisses my temple his long hair that he usually keeps tied back but left out for the night brushes against my cheek.

"Its okay we have a few minutes now. " I'm confused now.

"Koga what are you talking about?" He closes my room door before slowly moving from behind me to face me giving me a soft kiss to the lips.

"Inuyasha I've always wanted to do this." I feel frozen to the floor as he gets down on his knees and kisses my stomach through the thin fabric of the graphic tee. Lifting it up exposing it as he unbuttons then unzips my pants.

I feel cold fingers wrapping around awakening flesh and suddenly I'm not so confused. I reach down and grab his head in a panic.

"Koga what are you doing?" My hands frame the side of his face as I make him look up at me. His eyes are desperate looking.

"Please let me do this." He pleads looking up at me with my flesh in his hands, "I have loved you for so long and I've been trying Inuyasha, I have been." His face nuzzles against my bare stomach before kissing my belly button. "Please let me do this for you."

I look at Koga down there on his knees in front of me and I can't help but think of you. You who I have loved and cherished in my heart would never do this for me. It was always just for your pleasure your amusement, never for me.

But Koga who I don't love has gotten on his knees is kissing me. Like you have never done before and will never do.

Koga takes my silence as okay for him to continue and kisses his way down my stomach to where he is holding me in his hand. His mouth is hot where his hand was cold like ice, making me groan and move my hips as his lips wrap over me.

It's gentle, the suction is slow but firm, his lips are soft and his mouth is like velvet heat as it slowly engulfs me.

You never did this for me.

My knees grow weak and I'm forced to put my hand on my room door for balance. I feel Koga's hands trailing up the backs of my calves roaming over clothed skin and up to naked flesh. His hands reach my naked backside and starts kneading into the globes there.

You never did this for me.

I look down and there Koga is, his eyes are closed and cheeks blushed. His face is in an expression of ecstasy like he's actual enjoying giving me pleasure. He's a few inches taller than me and bulkier he could have easily forced me to do this for him. His fingers start playing at my entrance as the suction gets faster as I feel I'm taken in deeper.

Suddenly I'm angry.

You never did this for me!

You never held me like this or told me you felt anything for me!

Koga starts sucking faster and one of his fingers dryly nudges against me. The hand on the door makes a fist as my eyes close. You would only take for your self. You always made me feel like I was nothing. You even went off and got engaged to some she demon!

Koga's moaning in the back of his throat now, the vibrations traveling up and down my sensitized skin. My knees lock, his hands grip my backside as his one finger snuggly nestles inside me but doesn't move. My other hand finds its way behind his head and presses him closer to my groin while my hips rock back and forth moving me against his soft lips.

It's so hot.

You never would have ever done this for me.

My hips move faster and my hand clenches behind Koga's head as I release and crumble to the floor. Koga manages to stay with me his head lifts up from between my legs.

His eyes meet mine as he swallows.

My eyes are watering and I cover them with my arm I don't want him to see me crying. I don't want him to see how frustrated I am.

"Koga please, just go away." My voice is watery and it makes me even more frustrated. All this time I've been hiding this pain how I feel about you. Why does it now have to come out? Why these tears?

I feel him crawling up my body his hands take my arm away from my face. I feel the warm palm of his hand against my wet cheek turning me toward him.

"Hey Inu…what's wrong?" His voice is so soft and it only makes me cry harder. All I ever wanted was for you to show me you cared just a little bit. I poured out all my love to you and got nothing in return.

"Hey shhhh it's okay." His arms wrap around me and the hands at the back of my head bury my face in his chest. It feels so warm and good in his arms. My body is shaking with the strength of my tears.

Why did you never do this for me?

"Hey, hey look at me." Koga lifts my chin up and I finally open my eyes. I feel like I'm really seeing him for the first time. His face is tan and strong looking with high cheek bones and pouty lips. His blue eyes filled with love and concern.

"Come on Inu stop crying. You don't want to ruin your pretty face." His hand comes up and ruffles my bangs as he smiles at me.

You never would have done this for me…

You never held me or dried my eyes or even gave me words of encouragement.

But Koga has.

I feel like I'm waking up from some bad dream and for the first time I don't feel like the weight of my love for you is crushing me down. And that's what it was this love I had for you it was a heavy weight lodged in my heart. Your confusing actions and harsh words kept it growing bigger and bigger until I felt like I was dying.

"Hey, it's going to be alright." He says before kissing me on the forehead. We get up off the floor together; Koga lifted me up as he stood.

We walked to the bathroom together and he washed my face for me. He doesn't ask me the reason for my emotional break down on the floor and I'm grateful.

After that we both walk out my room down the stairs and out the house to the relief of our annoyed friends jam packed in Miroku's tiny car.

Koga opens the door for me and I sit down next to Kagome then he squeezes in behind me. Miroku drives off while Kagome starts prattling about what type of music is going to be playing at the club. Koga doesn't say anything about what happened in my room. And the rest of the gang doesn't ask what took us so long. He just sits scrunched next to me in the back seat of Miroku's car with his arm around me while the girls enthuse about our night on the town and Miroku fights to concentrate on the road with all their squealing going on.

I feel good and happy and clean for the first time in a long time while sitting in Koga's embrace. For the first time since we started whatever it is you want to call it; a tryst, a love affair what ever, I'm not thinking of you.

I've woken up from my nightmare of false love.

I've taken off the mask that hid my pain.

For me brother it's no longer a masquerade.

* * *

**OMIGOODNESS! I live and have actually updated this story! I'm so sorry I've abandoned it for so long. College has been kicking my butt but that's all good. Now I'm on break and trying to update my stories and get back into the writing groove. I will finish this! I promise you, and all the other stories I'm working on. Thank you so much for reading and keeping up with mah crazeh updating!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha. Inuyasha is a copy write of Rumiko Takahashi and VIZ entertainment. **


	10. Lifting the Veil

_I've seen it all…_

_-Bjork_

Ch. 10: Lifting the Veil

Inside the club the music was loud and the bass crunching. So many bodies were crushed together in the small two story building; I was having trouble figuring out how we all fit. His private contact didn't come out to greet us but apparently we were on a list of sorts and we all got passed the bouncers with out a hitch. I stayed close to Koga even after we got in we were so packed together that every now and then I'd feel a hand or another body part that wasn't his brush past me.

Why did the girls find this so fascinating? This suffocating place with the loud music and flashing lights, personally it was a big headache for me but that was ok. I could endure anything now that I've given up thinking about….no I won't say it. Not even in my mind. Koga is my focus now. I won't hurt him by thinking it. We somehow all make it to the bar through the crowded entrance and I finally get a chance to look at him in the strobe lights.

His arm is around me freely his big shoulder brushing against my puppy ear making it flicker. His head is turned away from me so all I get is the site of his strong jaw line and neck. He's talking to some well dressed man, probably the contact that allowed all five of us to get in here. His arm is warm and I just relax into it and look around. I know this place has to be well over its fire safety limit. All these people here. I look over to the other side of the bar where the rest of our little group is.

Kagome and Sango are in heaven and Miroku looks a little mortified but that could be because of the pink fruity drink the girls ordered and then placed one in front of him.

"Come on Miroku its good!" I here Sango yell at him over the music. Miroku looks at the drink like it's going to pour its cool contents in his lap or something.

"But it's pink!" Miroku yells back pointing to the offensively colored drink. "When I asked you to get me a drink I didn't ask for a glass of gay!" Sango just rolls her eyes at her boyfriend and his trying to retain his manliness, then goes back to bouncing to the music with Kagome, while sipping on her own fruity concoction. I laugh a little bit when I see Miroku taking a tentative sip. His eyes light up and I feel like my lungs are going to burst with my repressed laughter…Miroku always did like fruity flavors.

This is actually nice. Koga's arm around me possessively no one seems to really care that two guys are basically embracing. But as I look around to the other patrons the club seems to be a mix between straight and gay couples. There were even some couple's who were demon and human mixed. This club for all its crowdedness had a real chill vibe to it.

"What's got you giggling over here?" Koga asks me finally finished talking to the other guy who is no longer next to him.

"Nothing just Miroku." Koga's eyebrow raises and that, before he looks over at the other guy covertly trying to enjoy his pink drink. Koga let's out one of his own hearty laughs.

"Wow that is worth giggling over." I can't help but smile at Koga's toothy grin. His fangs are a little bigger than mine and more curved but I find that even more attracting. It somehow makes his smile more devilish and contagious.

"What?" The wolf asks. I blink and feel my own lips have moved into a grin to rival his own. This is strange I feel so light and happy. Something I haven't felt in a long time…and Koga did this to me. His love and care brought me out of a dark place and into this peace.

I want to kiss him right now. I feel like no one would care in this club of blended couples if I just leaned over and kissed him a little bit on the lips.

I lean over to him but soon realize sitting down he's much taller than I thought he was and I have to get him to lean down a little bit so our lips can meet.

"Hey Koga?" I ask against the side of his neck since that's all I can reach right now.

He swallows heavily and I feel his pulse start to quicken. I can't help it my tongue slides out of my mouth and I lick it. He takes in a sharp breath then blows it out.

"Inuyasha…?"He asks his voice shuddering.

I just want to kiss him but the affect I have on him is much more interesting and it makes me want to explore a little more. I kiss him where his pulse is beating erratically. His fist tightens on the bar.

I nip at it with my front teeth and his back stiffens but still he groans.

"Inuyasha…seriously stop." His voice doesn't sound so convincing to me so I nip him again than lick him. His skin tastes of cinnamon and I like the spiciness of it.

"Why?" I can't help but ask. I feel so giddy and it's a powerful feeling that I can do this to him.

His hand is own my arm as he pulls away from me and I get a good look at his eyes. There warm and shimmery. The usual cool blue darkened and heated by his arousal. Something tightens in my stomach.

"Because, if you don't I'm going to take you. Right here. Right now." His voice is so serious, like he's trying to save me from something. But I don't want to be saved. Not from Koga. I want to feel his strength all over me and around me. The idea of him loosing control and actually taking me on the floor isn't completely dissuading to me. Koga groans and lets his head fall as he see's my expression. I'm actually thinking about it and apparently so is he.

"Inuyasha…why are you such a seducer?" I can't help but laugh at that. I would have never tried to seduce you but with Koga his body visibly responds to my every touch. I can't help but to tease him a little. But, I'm finding that by teasing him I'm torturing my self as well. My pants are a little tight in places they weren't before.

"Hey you two love birds stop being all kissy faced and come dance with us!" Kagome screeches over the volume of the music her fruity pink drink is gone and I see Miroku dancing with Sango on the dance floor back where she left them.

Usually I wouldn't but Koga gets up quickly before I can say anything and drags me behind him while he follows Kagome back to our other friends. The music is fast and happy some type of house beat. I'm really enjoying dancing my hair bouncing around us. We're all having a good time. The next song comes on and the beat gets slower. Koga gets closer to me his arms bracing me from behind as we rock to the beat. Sango and Miroku have paired off and a little ways down the dance floor I see Kagome slow dancing with some tall blonde guy that probably goes to our school.

It feels so warm and good, I'm a sucker for body heat and closeness something you've never freely given me, and even when we were close, bodies touching. It always felt like there was coolness to it.

No! Dammit I said I wasn't going to think of you! Why are you coming into my thoughts even now as I'm embraced by the one who sincerely loves me? The hairs on the back of my neck stand on end and I feel like someone is watching me. I look up from where I was staring at me and Koga's intertwined hands and look up to the second floor.

There I see you Kagura wrapped around your left arm whispering something in your ear. It doesn't look like you're listening very well to your fiancé. You're staring right at me face tight…hands fisted on the iron wrought railing in front of you. Our eyes meet….and again I feel like dying…

xXx

After that meeting in the club I haven't been able to get you out of my head. And Koga hasn't been able to cheer me up. I don't want to go home…but I am. I just want to run to my room and hide. Get under the covers and pray they protect me from you.

Your eyes…I can't get that out of my head. The utter pain and rage I saw snapping in them. The jealousy there, it made my heart skip into my throat and something more dangerous…a little glimmer of hope fluttered against my brain.

That maybe if you look at me like that you really feel something for me…stupid I know but the thought is there now and like a parasite it's taken root and won't unlatch. Koga rubs my shoulders and my back and kisses my forehead. Trying to get me to respond the way I was earlier…warmly. But I haven't been able to since our eyes met I can't and I feel bad about that.

Miroku pulls up into my drive way and I open the car door to get out but Koga grabs my hand before I can fully walk out the car.

"Hey, you want me to stay with you tonight?" He asks gently.

I look at Koga and I know he see's the pain in my eyes. He's confused as to what's caused it but willing to fix it either way. I'm struck with how much Koga cares for me and I feel like crying again. I don't trust my voice but I shake my head no. What would happen if you found us in my room? Smelt both are scents mingling…I don't think the door would hold you. Even though I shake my head Koga gets out the car anyway.

"Look just let me stat with you for a little while." He whispers, "I won't stay the night if you don't want me to but I won't have this look on your face any longer." His hand is under my chin trying to get me to look at him but I can't. I don't say anything…let Koga do what he wants. I'm too weak right now to fight…even with words.

I feel him turn and face our friend shutting the car door behind him.

"Hey I'm going to stay with Inuyasha until he feels better." I hear him tell them.

"What's wrong with him?" Kagome asks a little concern in her voice.

"Don't worry about it he just drank too much." Which is a lie we both know I didn't drink anything but whatever to get them to leave. I'm shaking…my legs don't feel like my own. And my heart is racing.

Your car's not in the driveway so that means we beat you home. I want to get inside and at least out of view before you get home.

"All right well see you on Monday Inu! Hope you feel better!" They all yell as they drive away. I have such loving and caring friends yet I feel like I'm constantly starved for love. Because I crave the love of one bastard…you. Why can't I get over it? It's wrong! It's disgusting! Your love makes me hate myself!

There gone and I here Koga sigh as he walks up to me.

"Do you have a house key?" He asks. I nod my head slowly but I don't make an attempt to reach for it. Koga sighs again then reaches into my pocket and grabs the ring I keep my keys on.

There's only two keys on it one is the house key the other is the garage key.

"Can you walk?" I honestly think about that for a moment then nod my head yes. I can walk I would probably run right now if you pulled into the driveway.

"Okay." Koga says before wrapping his arms around my shoulders and walking me to my door. He uses the keys to open the big mahogany door to our four story house. He sucks in a big breath as he looks around at the high ceilings, big expensive furniture and plush carpet. I don't really see it. I never saw it, it's just a house.

"Wow." I hear him say under his breath. I take off my shoes then start walking to the staircase and up to my room.

Koga looks around a little more before doing the same and following me up the stairs.

"I mean I always knew your dad was rolling in it but damn." Koga whistles under his breath as we pass an a thousand year old ceramic vase that's been in my family for centuries.

"It's just a house Koga with stuff in it, like any other house." I say my voice is a little thin.

"Yeah but the stuff you have in here is like nothing I've seen before!" He replies enthusiastically.

"Whatever Koga…" I don't mean to be rude but all I want to do is get into my room and lock the door. Maybe later I'll take him on a tour of our mansion like house but right now…all I want to do is pass out.

Finally we reach my room after what feels like an eternity. I just drop my shoes and let them fall where they may. Then trudge over to my bed and let my body drop heavily onto it. I ask Koga to lock the door and he does before putting his shoes down a little more gently by my huge computer desk.

It's silent now.

I even almost forget that Koga's here until my bed dips as he crawls on behind me.

I feel his fingers in my hair sliding against my scalp. I don't react I just lay there and let him do what ever. His hand stays in my hair as he snuggles up to me. He uses the hand in my hair to bring me closer and I let him lay my head on his chest. His heart is beating fast again and I can smell his arousal start to spike but he doesn't react to it. He just holds me and I let him. The warmth feels good. This is the first time anyone has really held me in what feels like my entire life time. This room has been witness to many depraved acts over the past year and I can't help but think about all of them. You sneaking into my room to fuck me.

All Koga wants to do is hold me and let me get my head together. But you never did that it was only the physical. All you wanted was my body. You never cared once about my mental well being.

Never cared what your relationship with Kagura was doing to me. Why?

Why did you do it? You could've had anyone and still can. Why did you choose me for this torture? Do you hate me that much?

All these thoughts running through my brain, I don't want to think I don't want to remember the feel of you touching me. In this bed. In this room.

"Koga…make me forget…" I feel him move probably looking at the top of my head. I'm not sure if he heard me speak or not. I'm not sure I really wanted him to hear that.

"Make you forget what?" He asks, he's moving my head now. His hand back under my chin making me look at him. I avert my eyes…should I tell him? Tell him my greatest darkest secret that I'm in love with my own brother and can't get him out of my head?

No…not yet. I want to enjoy Koga's unconditional love with out anything marring it. I know the knowledge will make him look at me differently. He may even disgust me. I'm not sure I'd be able to take his scorn right now so no. I don't tell him. Instead I lean into him and kiss him, tasting his lips slowly until he responds back to me. His hand moves from my chin to my neck and then down my shoulders. Squeezing my arms and feeling the muscles there. I move closer to him touching his chest as well tentatively with my own hands. I feel it the fire he ignited earlier is still there.

Koga can make me forget.

Koga will make me forget.

Forget you.

Forget my pain.

Forget my love.

Forget myself...

* * *

**Ok so this took a little while to get out and it has a part two this chapter is umm…extra long! Thirteen MS Word Pages and almost 3,000 words! So I hope my readers enjoy this update to Masquerade and let me know whatcha think!**

**-Angel See ya in the next chapter!**


	11. Lifting the Veil Pt2

Chapter 11: Lifting the Veil Pt.2

_I wonder, I wonder…what happens next?_

_-Bjork, New World_

I can't take it anymore, the lies the deceit…the heart ache. For once I want to feel something that is not a lie. I want to feel something good and right. And this is good and right. Koga's hand on my chest his warm breath on my neck and lips, feel right. I don't want this feeling to go to stop or end. Our bodies are so in tuned to each others, weird since we've only fooled around a few times. But even though this feels good and Koga's feelings for me are warm. I'm still longing for a cold touch. Your cold touch.

No!

Koga make me forget!

Kiss me again.

Touch me…here…no…not there not where…he…you….touched me.

It's tainted.

This room is tainted, this bed. Me. I can't help but think of you here now. Even when someone else is embracing me, I can't enjoy it.

It feels so wrong even though you have put me through all these emotional upheavals, I still can't get you out of my mind. Out of my heart.

_Sesshomaru. _

Koga stops as I become unresponsive. His face is puzzled and I can only imagine why. Who was it that goaded his lusts throughout the night? It was only a few hours ago when I longed for his kiss but now. In this bed, in this house where your scent is surrounding everything; I can't help but think of you.

_Sesshomaru…._

"Koga. I can't. I'm sorry I led you on but I just can't be with you; not tonight or ever." I keep my head buried in Koga's chest too afraid to see his response.

He sighs slowly pushing me away.

"I guess the rumors were true then huh?" I look up at him with confusion in my eyes.

"What rumors?"

Koga's eyes look sad his face twisted in a helpless frown as he takes a deep breath of his own.

"The rumors about how you and your brother have been mating."

I bow my head in shame knowing he will hate me now; it is as much taboo amongst yokai as well as humans for siblings to behave in such a way. But I also bow my head to hide my reaction to his words; it strangely pleases me that people think that we are mated. Even though I know that is untrue and will never be. Oh what Koga must think of me now?

"It's ok Inu…" He says taking me back into his arms, "Now I understand why you've turned me away." I can't help it but tears come to my eyes. Koga is the one I should be so in love with.

"I'm sorry Koga I tried…I tried to forget him…with you I'm so…sorry." The tears come freely now as I think about everything the wolf and I could've had, if I wasn't so tainted with this obsession with you. Shudders wreak havoc through out my body and he just holds me while smoothing my hair down my back. It's all so loving and gentle this is what I craved from Koga. I feel so guilty about all this I feel just as bad as you, using the one who loves me most knowing that they would never turn me away.

We sat there for so long the minutes fading into hours neither of us moving just reveling in the warmth of each other. Until I heard your car pulling into the fear jolts up my back.

"Koga you should go." I say but the wolf doesn't move he keeps holding onto me. By now he has leaned back on to my pillows propping his no doubt straining back up.

The front door opens and now even the soothing feel of Koga and his hand in my hair cannot ease my tense shoulders. Soon you will come up stairs and smell our scents…mingled together. No doubt you already know Koga is hear by the unknown pair of shoes resting on the foyer floor.

"Koga please…you should go!" My voice is urgent as I hear you making your way up the stairs….slowly like you are preparing yourself for what you are about to see. Or just drawing out the tension like the sick bastard you are.

I grab the hand that is around my waist and try to pry it off me but Koga only smiles and keeps it there. My eyes bug out of my head does the wolf have a death wish, I think. My room is the first one at the entrance of the hall way you will pass it shortly and undoubtedly…

My thoughts are suddenly interrupted as the room to my door burst off its hinges. Pieces of white would are splintered hanging on for dear life from the once solid barricade.

I can't look so I bury my head in Koga's chest I can feel your strong yokis swirling in the air suffocating me. Choking us with its potency before you even get the chance to do it with your hands.

"What….is…the…meaning…of…this?" Each word comes out strong and after a deep inhalation after each one. I hear as well as see in my minds eye the frigid anger in your eyes that are definitely tinted with the red of your more base side.

" 'Sup Sesshomaru." Koga says all nonchalantly, I'm not sure if he looks up to meet your stare as he says it. I'm guessing probably not because the wolf never stops petting me. His big hand fondles one of my ears then goes back to stroking my hair.

You growl ferociously and I whimper against Koga's chest. It is suddenly so quiet in my room after that blast from you knocking in the door. Only the labored sound of your breathing permeates the tense silence. I try to pull away once more but again Koga stops me this time putting a finger underneath my chin making me look up into his cool and calm blue eyes. I'm struck with the image of clear blue reflecting pools that bare the soul but also soothes it.

"Release him!" Your voice is a gravel snarl but Koga doesn't seem to hear you as he leans in and…kisses me on the lips. A sound connection of soft flesh. Right…in…front…of you.

I don't get a chance to react you are attacking Koga. The full body check you give him throws the both of you off my bed and on to the floor. I see a tangle of silver and black as the two of you snarl bite and claw.

"You have touched him! You have touched what is mine!" Koga is pinned underneath you your pale hand wrapped around his thick tan throat. Even in the compromising position Koga doesn't seem afraid. Instead of the calm that he was exuding moments ago, now he is seething mad. His thin lips pulled back in a snarl revealing his long slightly curved fangs.

"Why do you care so much huh?" Koga grabs the forearm of the arm that is restraining him at his neck twists and now you are underneath him struggling to get free. The ookami plants him self on your stomach somehow grabs a hold of your writs pressing down hard. You snarl right back at him but your fangs look smaller more dainty. No doubt do to your refined inu blood tamed by breading that bread out your wild features while Koga still retained his.

"Answer me dog!" I'm huddling at the far corner of my bed to afraid to make any sudden moves and too enhanced to get up and leave or help you. I'm curious as to how this will turn out.

"I should kill you for touching him!" You yell trying to get free of the hard grasp Koga has on your writs. Instead the wolf gets all in your face.

"I will take him away from you." Koga's lips brush against yours as he speaks you are so close. "This night I will incapacitate you and take him away from you. We both know I can do it."

Your face pales, "No…no you can not do that!" Of course you wouldn't want that to happen…I am only a possession. A symbol of your dominance over lesser beings but brother why do you pale so, like you afraid of something?

Koga grins evilly as he growls.

"Watch me." We both watch as Koga lifts his head back and goes to but his forehead against the space where your nose and forehead meet. Before he can make contact with that most sensitive spot you move out of the way taking advantage of Koga's disorientation as his forehead makes contact with the floor you get out of the grapple hold get up and stomp the heel of your foot in to his back. A whoosh is heard as all the air escapes the wolfs lungs.

"No one is taking what is mine." You turn to me now. Our eyes meet across the few feet that separate us. Before you can move to take a step Koga comes and tackles you from behind. I eep as the two of you grapple on the bed. Somehow you get into a position where Koga has a clawed hang grasping your cheeks turning your head to look at…me.

"Look at him Sesshomaru! I mean really look at him. He is miserable from the way you treat him. When you take ownership of something you make sure it is treated well and you have failed. Look how his eyes are pained his body tense. You don't deserve to be his alpha!" A pained look comes across your face as Koga says this. Something in my heart flutters and hope springs to life a dangerous bloom taking root in my heart and mind.

Your eyes close and I'm prepared for you to say something biting back to Koga but instead your brow furrows as a lone tear escapes your left closed eye. When you open them again I am met with an expression on your face that I have never encountered before.

"I know…" you whisper chilling my bones and breaking my heart all at once.

* * *

**So I dragged my ass out of this dang on creative slump thingy by FORCING myself to write this and finish it.**

**Thanks so much to all of you who have stuck with this story even though the updates have been far apart. You guys don't know how much your reviews and the fact that this story is still getting favs and hits inspires me to write. Oh yeah and Bjorks haunting voice is a muse for me all it's own as well. Thanks again you guys and I hope this chapter was worth waiting for. **

**-Angel**

**XXX**

**Inuyasha and other cannon character belong to Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Entertainment.  
**


	12. Show and Tell

"_And your dear strong fingers clutch his heart…"_

_ Bjork, Sonnets Unrealities XI_

Chapter 12: Show and Tell

My chest hurts as I see my agony reflected in your eyes. For some strange reason I want to comfort you. My hand reaches out of its own accord and caresses the cheek that isn't pressed into my overused mattress. Your eyes close as you try to lift your head to get closer, but Koga's harsh grip on your hair keeps you planted where you are.

"You see that?" Koga seethes his sharp teeth at your ear again.

"Despite all he has gone through with you he still seeks your happiness!"

Koga is right, I am hopeless. Hopelessly in love with a brother who has none for me. No use hiding it anymore.

"I love you Sesshomaru." Felt right to say it, with you restrained by Koga forced to listen to him and me. Felt like the best time to tell you when you are trapped and can not run away. No longer able to escape my truth.

Koga's eyes narrow as I say this but he does not say anything to me instead he addresses you. With a harsh tug on your scalp he asks you.

"Do you think you are worthy of that love?" Without you having to say it I know you do not feel as if you do. Again that wretched hope tries to consume my heart. The seed threatening to grow into something larger.

You swallow; your throat muscles are standing out in stark relief against your skin from the angle Koga is arching your neck and back.

"I love you too Inuyasha."

And like that I burst. The seed explodes into a tree its roots diving deep in my heart while its thick branches clog my throat with emotion.

"You lie!" Koga seems really angry now grabbing a handful of hair; he pulls mercilessly at making you strain against him. I am stunned at the picture the two of you make with your neck strained, eyes closed while you bare your fangs in discomfort. Your backside is awfully tight against his hips.

That throat of yours is working again like you want to say something but do not have access to the necessary air supply to say the words at the moment.

"Not….lying." You manage to gasp out as you try to maneuver out of Koga's grasp. His one handed grip is too tight in your hair the other hand pins both of yours to the bed.

The wolf scoffs at your struggles then looks at me with blue eyes the color of the sky before a thunderstorm, energized and cloudy.

His eyes never break the contact with mine as he addresses you.

"You love him so much huh?" Finally Koga lets you go and throws you at my feet on the bed. "Then prove it." He says while stepping back from you.

At first you don't move, like you don't know what to do with your new found freedom, then you push yourself up to face me. I notice that finally our eyes look like the twins they are. Each is filled with desperation so deep. You reach out to touch me but again Koga is there catching your hand.

"No, you ask him first." You snatch your hand back a low growl starting in the back of your throat while you narrow your eyes at the wolf. When they turn back to me they have blessedly softened.

"Inuyasha will you let me touch you?" I'm not sure what to be more shocked of, the fact that you actually listened to Koga's command or that you are asking me permission? You've never asked to touch me before. Then you would just man handle me in any way you saw fit like the possession you thought I was.

Now you look at me with reserve in your eyes and I desperately want to tell you that, yes, you can touch me. But I suddenly have no words. I look to Koga for help because he started this and the rules were made by him. He had become the referee to our clandestine existence. I lean forward close to you and he gives a nod as if in approval so I continue. Scooting closer to you I reach out and lay my hands on your chest. One is lying right over your thumping heart.

I'm struck by how warm you are through the fabric I'm so used to you being so cold towards me.

Koga lays his hand overtop of mine on your heart. "Feel him." He whispers in between us. I'm not sure if he is talking to you or me but I continue my slow perusal of your chest. This is the first time I've been able to touch you the way I've always wanted to. My hands tremble as I slide them down to the hem of your shirt. Surprisingly you help me take it off you and hiss when my bare hand hits flesh. I pull my hand back shocked but you grab it and gently bring it back.

"No don't stop." You say splaying my fingers wide using my hand to touch your face and neck then back down your chest. You allow me to continue with out the aide of your hand guiding me letting me explore at my own leisure.

"See how his breath hitches?" Koga's voice is in my ear and I'm not sure when he got behind me. He embraces me hands on my chest doing to me what I was to you. The mimicry making me arch my back against the wolf making my hands leave you for only a second.

Which you obviously do not like because you growl low in your throat.

"Watch it wolf."

Koga kisses the side of my neck I can feel that his lips have lifted in a smile that is no doubt agitating you more.

"I'm not the one who has some making up to do." I'm so stunned at this moment the fact that I'm between the two of you being shared and loved by you the way I have always wanted to. And you're not going mad. Koga somehow managing to curb that homicidal urge you had to flay him in light of this moment. Your eyes flicker with emotion at his words and I know your guilt is the leash that keeps you in check…for now.

"As long as it is what Inu wants I will not stop." The devious wolf tweaks one of my nipples and I gasp.

"Is this what you want?" He whispers hotly in my ear, I let my head fall back onto his shoulders but watching you all the while he does this. Watching your eyes, I see hunger there and want. The yearning for you to be able to do more to me rages behind your eyes as you watch the wolfs tanned hands play at my chest. I feel your body vibrating but I'm not sure what from…pent up rage, or from the desire to touch me as he is? I watch your eyes but you aren't paying attention to me instead you watch Koga's hands as they travel further south on my belly. He asks me the question again but I do not get a chance to answer as you shoot forward no longer able to hold back, moving Koga's hands away from my stomach and kiss me there. I moan and arch into you as your warm tongue darts out of your mouth and dips into my belly button. My hand tangles in your moonbeam hair as you lick and nip and suck.

"Did he ask for that?" Koga's voice is a warning growl against my neck that sends little shockwaves down my spine.

"He's not pushing me away now is he?" I feel a tug against the waist band of my pants and I open eyes that I wasn't aware I had closed to see you tugging at the jeans exposing a brush of silver curls and my boxers. My nerves are tingling from all the sensory overload I feel overwhelmed but not uncomfortably so in between the two of you, being gently fought over. I don't know what to do when my pants are finally pulled away and then I am engulfed by such heat. The fact that I know it is you doing this to me, you who has only taken pleasure from me but never really taken the time to give it sears me more than the heat of your mouth can. I want to burst into tears from happiness, but instead you make me burst in another more pleasurable way. You break me apart in Koga's arms shatter me with the soft swirls of your tongue. Your soft but strong suckling puts me back together. A tingling starts at the bottom of my spine while my hips try to move against your lips but your weight on and around my hips and legs keeps them still. _Trapped._

Pleasurably so, I can't get free all I can do is hold onto your head for dear life and claws getting tangled in that silky hair of yours as I gasp for air that is escaping my lungs a little too quickly. Koga apparently getting tired of being out of the fun and games leans down and kisses me. He only waits a moment for me to start kissing him back before he pushes his tongue through the barrier of my lips. Suffocating me with the taste and smell of him. It's too much the pressure is building at the tip of my cock and now in my head as I can't get any air. I release on a shout that Koga greedily sucks into his mouth as you greedily swallow something else. Even though I have finished you stay where you playing with me there with your mouth. Like you enjoy the feel of me and keeping me from going completely soft. Finally you lift your head from between my thighs cheeks red and lips swollen. Your eyes are practically on crimson from the want of me. The gold turning into a deeper version of itself making me wonder if you other side has somewhat taken over.

"Inuyasha I never thought you would taste so sweet." You say with those burning eyes locked on mine. I feel my face heating up the blush traveling from the tips of my ears all the way to my toes. I try to cover my face only to discover my hands are trapped on the bed underneath both yours and Koga's. Yours and Koga's eyes meet and a silent agreement pass between the two of you.

"Yeah go ahead," the wolf says, "show him with your body what you have been telling him all night. I think he needs it now more than an explanation of why you put him through all the shit you did. That can always come later." It went unsaid that Koga would be here with us he the catalyst that started it all, he would be here as we come together for the first time lovingly and he would be here to listen as I as the your side of this story unfolded from your lips later on.

I feel that when you stand up to undo your leather belt and slide off your slacks that both me and Koga are watching your back curve sensuously with bated breath. When you turn and come back to the bed I can see that your fingers are trembling as the fact that you are about to touch me. But you do not move you look at me in between Koga's legs the wolf's arms around me and you just stare. I wonder what is going through your mind right now. Are you thinking about how we look together are different skin tones clashing? Or maybe your thinking about the fact that Koga has been there for me to comfort me where you haven't and couldn't, and how good we look together?

What ever it is that has you lost in your thoughts you shake your self from them wrestle yourself out of their grasp like you tried to do Koga's earlier, and come back to bed. It's Koga's turn to get up and shuck off the rest of his clothing but neither of us looks at him as he does. The short moment it takes for Koga to become nude we look only at each other. I think the weight of what we are truly about to do has finally settled in both are brains and I open thighs that are surprisingly steady. Bearing myself to you in a way I never thought I ever would again. But I guess as the old saying goes…_never say never._ And always be careful what you wish for.

Still watching me I watch you lift a hand to your mouth sliding a few digits inside…wetting them. I gasp as they find that secret place that I never once hid from you nudging slickly inside.

"Starting without me I see." The wolf's voice is filled with feigned chagrin as he comes back to the bed. You let me move and turn to Koga my backside facing you. Those wonderful fingers never leaving but another one is added to the two as I am not a virgin the addition is greatly appreciated. I gasp at the feel of your hand on one of my cheeks spreading and I feel your hot stare as you watch what you are doing to me. I see Koga watching you and me those cloudy blue eyes filled with ripe lust.

"I've always kind of wondered what the two of you looked like together." His breathy voice is loud in the suddenly quiet room where only the slickness from your fingers and the mattresses slight squeaking can be heard.

I meet Koga's needy stare while he leans down and kisses me softly before guiding my head to where he needs me most. I open my mouth and take him in watching as the muscles in his neck chord when my tongue touches the tip of him.

"It's crazy." He gasps out, "But the two of you are ethereal."

"You're flattery is so not needed just be grateful you were allowed to be here." I hear you scoff at the wolf's words.

"No need to take out your inability to accept compliments on the person who got you two back together." Koga bites back but after that all words are halted as I feel your hair spilling around my hips and back side.

Koga gasps at what you are doing as it makes me latch onto him harder. I would pant if I could the sensation of your tongue probing there driving me mad. I feel the pin prick of your claws digging into my flesh as you spread me further apart slickening me. You seem to stay there forever languishing at the core of me. Dragging the desperation you are building in me until I feel like I am going to burst with out you even having entered me. Then finally you are there easing the aching pressure. I do hiss then Koga's erection popping out of my mouth. Arching my back I try to take all of you and with a grunt you oblige and I am blessedly full. Taking Koga back into my mouth I am full and moaning against him as you start to move.

"Damn you look beautiful." Koga does some hissing of his own.

I feel hands all over me, touching, squeezing, caressing. Your hair tickles my back like a thick silky wave moving with the rhythm of your body between my thighs. Koga's hand is on my face again, caressing my jaw, making me look up at him. He is watching us with such intensity and I wish I could see your eyes all of a sudden.

Instead I close my eyes and let the sensations wash over me. The thickness throbbing in my mouth and the feel of you surging inside me makes me tremble. The rhythm of your hips gets quicker snapping fiercely against me. Moans ring out in my room and I'm not sure who's they are anymore. Sweat breaks out all over my body as urgency takes over.

Koga grabs onto my face and thrusts faster and I brace myself by gripping the sheets as both of your bodies take over. I'm overwhelmed again by the both of you. The taste of Koga in my mouth and the slick feel of you inside me I'm becoming light headed again from the feeling of suffocation. Though my throat is opening and letting Koga slide effortlessly down I can't breathe. My eyes roll into the back of my head and when I feel like I'm going to pass out a great wave of heat and pleasure overtakes me and I fall off the edge of the cliff I was hanging precariously over. The tremors of my body takes you with me as you shout and a warm wetness blooms where we are connected. The wet heat of you makes me gasp Koga's erection falling free of my mouth leaving nothing but my face to catch his release. We all don't move for moments that seem like centuries as our orgasms over take us we stay still riding the little quakes and aftershocks until almost in unison we all crumple to the bed. Gasping for air recovering from the physical and emotional ride.

I don't say anything as two pairs of arms wrap around me and two pairs of legs fight for a place in between mine. I sigh as someone, I'm not sure who blessedly takes something and wipes Koga's cooling release from my face and lips. No one says a thing for a long time as we get comfortable in my suddenly too small bed. Sheets rustle and masculine grunts of discomfort are heard. When all finally falls silent Koga's voice breaks the silence.

"I'm too sapped to move and I won't say anything if you don't, dog."

I feel what I think is your head nod behind my back and above my head.

"Agreed…wolf." By the tone of your voices you both definitely still don't like each other but neither of you say anything as you curl your bodies around me and both your hands end up somewhere on my hip. Enveloped in both of your bodies' heat I'm not sure what just happened between the three of us. Or how we were going to feel and look at each other. All I know is that right now you are holding me gently with warmth seeping from you that I never thought I would feel. No longer were you the cold unyielding brother and Koga was the one who made this all happen.

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**Nope not gonna go more than a month before I update this bad boy anymore. I gots plenty of time on my hands now. So yeah did I deliver or what! More than 3,000 words in this update so yeah ya can't say I don't love you guys! And I really do, thanks for all the new reviews and favs. You reviewers really got my butt in gear to finish this chapter. So let me know what ya think. K? **

**And as always Inuyasha and all it's original characters belong to the wonderful Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Entertainment. **

**See ya soon in the next chapter.**

**_Angel_  
**


	13. 1940

_So rise and shine. Now's the time to be alive to stay awake with me awhile_

-_The Submarines_, 1940

Chapter 13: 1940

The smell of coffee wafts to my nose making me remember that terrible night when you caught me in the hall after being with Koga that first time. I hate coffee absolutely hate that acrid smell that gets into your nose and stays there like its protesting the rights of actually sweet smelling air. The stench is so close I can almost taste…

"I see you had a slumber party last night." Immediately my eyes snap open as that deep rumbling voice shakes me awake dread adding to the distaste from the already bad smell of the coffee.

Father is standing, no his big form looms over my bed with what would be a huge mug but his even larger hands dwarfs the size making the sturdy cup look as dainty as a piece of china. One dark eyebrow lifts up into the fringe of his bangs as he takes a sip from that cup and just watches all of us.

You have already shot up in the bed hands gripping the covers at your hips though they are twitching over the duvet with nerves your stare meets our fathers evenly. Koga is slowly stirring next to me somehow oblivious to the massive yokai presence in the room. The wolf's hand flutters against my stomach and his face nuzzles my hip before finally opening his sleepy azul eyes.

"Mmmm good morning puppy I-Oh shit." Finally taking notice of my father's presence Koga flies up into a sitting position and holds what little of the covers he has against his chest.

"Umm hi Mr. Tashio!" The ookami who was so confident last night of his actions between us squeaks out to the Dai Yokai. If this situation were any lighter I would laugh at the personality change but as I watch my father lean his hip against the wall his unreadable stare taking in every thing.

"Father I-" Before you can say anything else Father's big hand slashing across the air cuts you off.

"Before you even let the lie fly past your lips by the scent that is so deeply saturated in this room I know." All of our chins hit our chests in unison and my stomach roles with nerves, I feel like throwing up. Koga's hand sneaks over to mine and he squeezes making me feel a little better. Emphasis on a little.

"God I've actually known about your night trysts for a while now." Tentatively I look up and see dad swiping a palm over his face. The surprise of what he just said hits me next.

"Y-you've known about us?" I ask, even though father has already said it I have to hear it again.

Father's stare is in his mug as he answers me, "Yes I have known for a while that Sesshomaru and you have been intimate."

Koga scoffs and suddenly I am very angry. Father knew about us! Knew that we were lovers and still he invited that bitch ogress into our home and her brother who I nearly slept with to get back at you. If I wasn't stuck in between you and the wolf I would have left the room. Instead I stayed where I was too pissed off and worked up to deal with the hassle of squeezing out from the middle of two thickly muscled yokai.

"Why?" The question is a hiss that leaves my lips like a curse an apparently physical one at that has our father flinching like I slapped him.

The contents of his mug must be very intriguing to him this morning as it seems the dark swill has caught and held his attention. Though his voice addresses me.

"I didn't care what the two of you were doing. I'm from the old school the human imposed moral of siblings being unable to mate doesn''t hold any weight to me." Father swiveled the mug around in his hand a little bit before taking a sip and then continuing. "But you are a male demon and our estate needs legal heirs which you cannot provide for your brother."

I don't know what to say as father's words sink in and how you were hiding your surprise and satisfaction. Now we know that father is ok with you being with me. I can see the thoughts swirling in your head. You can have me even more openly than before, at least in the house.

My shoulders are shaking with suppressed rage of the knowledge that my father even see's me as a pawn to be useful and when I am no longer that to be discarded or worse…replaced.

I feel someone's arms wrap around me and am not surprised to see it is Koga the ookami demon's facial features showing all of the anger I was trying to hide behind mine.

"No disrespect Inutashio-sama but that is all kinds of fucked up." Father's eyes narrow but just like you Father says nothing. The sagging of his shoulders tells me why. He holds the same guilt as you do. Professing to love something but letting it go through such pain. Such emotional turmoil for no apparent reason at all. I suddenly can't take this.

I don't want to hear what else father has to say I don't want to hear what you won't say. My body is still sore from what we did last night. I was starting to call it lovemaking in my head, the first of which we have done in our entire relationship. But now I don't know. Did you just submit to it because Koga was there and forcing you? Was it just a way to get yourself back into my bed and back into my good graces? I close my eyes and lean into Koga I look for his spicy scent that is buried beneath both our musk's and when that cinnamony smell that is so unique to him hits my nose, I am comforted.

"Koga…" I whisper my voice but a thin wisp from all the emotion crowding my throat like hurried commuters stuffed in a full train car. I know he hears me though by the way his ears twitch and those deep blue eyes of his focus on me.

"Yeah?" He's rubbing my arms now trying to get the goose flesh that has bloomed on them to smooth out.

"I want to go away from here."

I feel shifting on the bed thinking that it is Koga getting ready to get dressed and get us out of this craziness but its not. I feel your gaze before I see it. Deep ocher eyes trained on me in Koga's embrace eyebrows narrowed in anger or annoyance I'm not sure.

"You are not going any where." Your voice is once again gravely but compared to Koga's I have come to think of it as a parody of a growl. Everything about you now is distorted to me and I thought we were making such progress…

"Well the Inu-boy here says he wants out and I can't help but want the best for him so he's going to get out." Father's deep voice cuts across the room his stare finally out of his cup and trained on us once again.

"He can not go anywhere. Even though Sesshomaru and his relationship does cause a few complications, he can not leave this house."

"I don't think it's your decision to make old man. Our boy here is over eighteen years of age and by human laws, which we so wonderfully run by now, says he can do whatever he wants."

"So says the wolf who is arguing with a Dai Yokai wrapped in a bed sheet. I am the law of this house out in the human world with human authorities that is another story but here according to _yokai _custom my word is law and he is my blood. I hold dominion of him."

Koga does something bold then and growls low and menacing at our most honorable father. The retaliating boom that comes out of Father's throat bouncing off the high ceilings of the room has me bowing my head in submission and Koga flat on his back. Father is over top of him.

"How dare you? In _my _house? I let the other offenses slide in deference to you protecting my youngest's honor but the utter _gall _to try and assert your dominance to me in my house!" Father's body is like a mountain pressing Koga's smaller hill into the thick carpet on the floor. The ookami may have been able to subdue you but he was centuries away from taking on father domesticated breed that he is he is still Dai Yokai. Without thinking I get up and try to run over and help Koga who is turning an alarming shade of blue, but you stop me with a tight hand on my wrist.

"No I will not let you go to him." I want to scoff and shrug you off. But most of all I want to scream at myself for staying in your hold. For allowing your eyes to trap me where I sit naked and bared underneath the tangle of sheets and covers.

"This is not fair Inuyasha, you have not yet let me explain my self."

That is what makes me shriek aloud as well as in my head.

"Fairness? _Fairness?_ Do you even know the mother_fucking _meaning of the word?" My voice is once again the gruffness it once was before this emotional mess happened with you I find strength in my anger and push you off of me.

"I loved you and you abandoned me for some she-ogre you don't even know and I doubt you even really like. You let me throw my self at her _brother_!" You are shaking your head making your hair glitter in the sunlight that it catches through the window in my room. I'm too pissed off to admire its beauty.

"All your choices Inuyasha and I don't fault you for making any one of them." Your eyes are desperate now while you reach out to me but I keep dodging your advances. I can't let you touch me if you do all the anger will melt away.

"Liar. You fucking liar. _I fault you for making me make those choices!"_ I don't even know if Koga is alive anymore, Father's crushing weight on top of him could have pushed all the oxygen out of the poor wolf by now but I couldn't bring my self to care. This moment our confrontation was what held all my attention. I feel like all the pain and degradation I went through has boiled down to this one heated moment.

"No. I didn't know I could love you. I had to keep you with me any way I could and Kagura at the time was that way. No one could know how I felt for you." By now I am standing naked far away from the bed, I'm not really sure how I got there but you are still advancing sheet coiled around your waist. Approaching me with one hand out walking slowly and gently reminding me of what someone would do to try and calm a wild animal they didn't want to spook. I see Father rising with Koga who is alive out the corner of my eye watching us.

"You could have told me this you bastard! You could have told me you loved me! Admit it, you liked lording over me so much you didn't want to share that you thought of me as equal!" The pained look that comes over your face tempers my anger a little. I was expecting a look of guilt not this. That hand you were trying to reach out for me goes to your chest. Right over your heart.

"I love you Inuyasha. All I ever did I did it for you to make things easier on you. You have no idea what Kagura would do to you if she even got the inkling I was deceiving her and if you had known my relationship with her was only a pawnsy scheme your smugness would have let her know. I know you Inuyasha you would not have been able to play along."

"Better to make me feel hopeless and like I didn't mean shit to you then let her know her real worth to you?" I can't believe it, one part of me is soaring at the declaration of your love another part is seething and hurt by the deceit.

"Yes. Inuyasha if you had known at the dinner we had a few weeks ago you would have jumped over the table and tried to skin her!" I hate that your logic is starting to sink into my head and calm me down. I want to stay mad. I want to be mad at you for months to make up for all the time I spent being a used puppy.

"If you love me so much like you say you do then just break up with her and be with me!" There it's out in the open. The desperation I have to have you all to my self is like a live thing. I hate that female more and more with every breath. I wish we weren't talking about her. I wish she had no precedence over our relationship what so ever.

"Inuyasha that would be harder than you think." We both turn and look to Father who is straightening his blue button down shirt.

"What do you mean by that old man? It seems pretty simple to me Sesshomaru just tells this Kagura to take a flying leap of an apartment building if she listens to his every word just like Inu here she should do it and be out of all our hair." The roughing up from Father obviously didn't teach Koga any new manners and Father narrows his eyes at the wolf in annoyance but doesn't subdue him as he answers the question.

"Kagura's brother has agreed to merge his company with ours if Sesshomaru marries her merging our bloodlines as well as businesses and apparently there have been some rumors circling about your relationship. Naraku has been even more adamant than ever to push the wedding date before Sesshomaru's graduation."

"That dinner little brother was us sealing the deal and the party at club Bliss was an engagement party of sorts. I've been the way I have been with you so the scent of sorrow and dismay rolling off you would prove those rumors moot." I shake my head trying to dislodge their words. Get the fact that my own blood has been manipulating me for monetary gain. What was I to them? A chess piece, a lowly one at that? I'm so tired of this nuevue aristocratic song and dance involving me. I thought masquerades ended centuries ago the great ones dying with the Venetians at the end of the Italian Renaissance. But I was wrong, they were still going on with in our mostly westernized society, and they weren't anything like the happy masked dances of old. The ridiculous masks replaced with hidden emotions and the joyous dances were now battles of wills and emotional endurance. I love you from the bottom of my heart but I can't do this anymore. I realize you will always have a certain type of hold on me that I will always be feld by your glance or your touch. But

I can't play this game anymore.

"Then do what ever you have to do to break it off." My voice is strangely even it doesn't quiver as I state my demands. I have been way too lenient through out this whole situation and, if Father won't let me leave and find my own way and since my heart will never give you up. I refuse to let the bitch demon win.

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**Fourteen Microsoft Word pages...anyone else noticing longer chapters? Cause I sure am _ Carpel tunnel here I come! **

**Anyways thanks for reading and I hope you guys enjoyed it oh and there is a link to the some fan art from the cuddle scene from the last chapter that will be in my profile if you want to check it out.**

**As always Inuyasha and company belong to Rumiko Takahashi and Viz Entertainment.**

**See you next chapter!**

**~Angel  
**


	14. Say You Love Me

_Something's wrong when you regret things that haven't happened yet._

_-The Submarines, _1940

Chapter 14: Say You Love Me

I never realized that a shower could be a luxury. After the screaming and horrible realizations that took place in my room I felt like I needed to clean my skin of not only the grime of you and Koga's mixed residues of love making. But I felt like I needed to power wash my room with something akin to 'negative-aura-be-gone'. There was no way I was going to be able to sleep in that room comfortably until all the negative memories had dissipated. Maybe it was time I upgraded all my furniture? Starting with my bed.

The hot water cascading down my body brings me back to the here and now. The frothy pine scented steam tingling in my nose and getting rid of the tenseness in between my shoulders better than any trained masseuses hand could ever accomplish. I am alone and for the first time in what feels like forever I'm glad for it. I don't need anyone to help me get rid of the memory of you or the pain and anger associated with them. I had made my peace with that this morning. In that room that will never be my room again, I had decided that my love for you was no longer going to be a painful thing anymore and that was that. I wasn't going to let you hurt me anymore. And you are going to make sure of that personally.

Bending over I reach down for my shampoo bottle, squeezing the bah-Jesus out of the thing to get the last dregs from it. Even though you and father had explained the complications of ending it so abruptly with Kagura I am not deterred in my resolve that you ending it with her would be the best situation for all of us. Working the silky lather into my hair I can't help but also think of how great Koga has been to me through out all of this. A true friend the only one I've been able to share all of my filthy secrets with. Since Kagome, Miroku and Sango were human I never imagined opening up to them and telling them this. After all incestuous sibling relations were not looked upon very kindly in human society. It wasn't really up to par with their moral standard.

Also the little fact that Koga was still madly in love with me, I'm a little worried about how his feelings will help in the end, if at all. He seems to be all for whatever I am for. Even though that person is another male other than him, I know it's a little selfish but I'm glad he still loves me even if I don't return his feelings. I find my self wishing him the best in finding someone else to love on though. Selfish feelings aside he is my friend still and I want the best for him as well.

I get underneath the spray from the shower head after working the strands of my hair into a thick lather. I stay underneath the nozzle for awhile and let the water beat a pattern out on my head luxuriating in the heat and soft feeling of the water. I keep my ears down as I do this and sigh when all the tension in my body seems to melt away with the spray.

I am utterly convinced now that a hot shower can be considered a luxury. Water shouldn't feel like hands caressing all over your body.

The little droplets shouldn't tease like finger tips tickling over sensitized skin. I open my eyes because the water is starting to feel a lot like hands and not in the metaphorical sense.

Opening my eyes I don't get a chance to focus on my caresser as a head and lips crash into my view and the pliant pillows against my lips makes me sigh and close my eyes.

Like I don't know who it is?

Without thinking I bury my hands into your quickly becoming wet hair my claws getting tangled on the heavy damp strands. Your thick hair wraps itself around me the water moves it down your shoulders and onto my stomach and chest. Adding to the sense overload the heavy strands fall between us like a soft shimmering curtain of moonlight, tickling my erection and yours which is being pressed against my thigh. I sigh as you move from my lips to my neck biting and sucking along the way. I know your lips are leaving red marks against my skin and I'm thrilled. All the better to taunt _her_ with. I want you to mark me in even more obvious places. The thought is quickly scattered from my brain and I don't try to chase after it as you take a particularly big bite at my shoulder. The feel of your fangs sinking deep into my flesh makes me hiss and swivel my hips. The tip of my erection nudges against the hard planes of your stomach sliding smoothly across the muscles there from the fluid leaking freely from the head. My hands in your hair press you closer but I find it is an unnecessary gesture. You aren't going anywhere. You're lovingly laving at the blood you've made well up there, a slow rumble of what I'm assuming is satisfaction vibrates at the back of your throat while you tongue bathe the wound.

The tile bites coldly at my back while your body burns me at my front and the contrasting feelings added with the still warm water cascading all around us leaves me breathless. I can't seem to catch my breath each move and gesture brushes my skin against something that makes the sensitized flesh hum and buzz. Sending pleasure signals that zing straight to the tip of my cock. The pressure building between us reminds me of the suckling you gave me last night and I so desperately want you to do that again. I open my mouth to ask you, maybe even beg you to do that again. But my words get cut off short because your mouth is there turning my intended words or pleas into breathy gasps and throaty groans.

My legs wrap around your waist the heels pressing into your muscular backside. The scant space between our two members suddenly feels like a chasm that must be closed. Your hips finally press into mine when you snake a cunning tongue in between my lips. Sliding sweetly against mine before dominating the kiss by probing every corner making sure nothing in my mouth goes undiscovered…unconquered. The kiss ends when your larger clawed hand buries into my nickel colored hair and pulls my head back. Bowing my neck and back making me hiss by pressing us ever closer.

"Don't ever say you are going to leave me again!" So that was what this was about. You were getting over the shock of me being threatened to be taken away from you by Koga and then wanting to leave you out right this morning. I can't help and don't fight the warmth that spreads through my chest at your subsequent fear of the loss of me. This was your way of making sure I was still really here with you.

How touching…

To know that this man handling of my body had a sweet and loving under current that I was made aware of by this mornings little secret unveiling fest in my room, make your actions even more erotic.

You are claiming me finally like I always wanted you to. Marking me in places that could be visibly shown through a reveling shirt such as a wife beater…the weather was getting particularly warm.

The firm hand in my hair turns gentle as you untangle your fingers from where they had taken up root at my scalp. You let them fan out and stroke my hair, soothing the ache they had caused. I close my eyes when gentle fingers play at the tips of my ears. My body shudders while you pet my ears keeping them flat so water doesn't get into the sensitive membranes. I bare my throat to you as I let my head fall back against the tiles feeling a vibration starting in the back of my throat. I'm not sure what it is, it can't be growling since I'm not angry. Far from it.

"Inuyasha…you're purring."

Damn I guess I am. The feeling of you pressed flush against me warm and big with those fingers caressing my sensitive ears. Knowing that you love me. It's almost better than the feeling of your hot mouth wrapped around my cock. My back arches from all the sensation and the memory.

Well almost better…

"Sesh…Sesshomaru." You move your ear closer to my lips even though I know you can hear me just fine.

"What is it Inuyasha…what does my little brother want?" The deep grumble of your voice vibrates against your chest which is pressed against mine. I can't help but lick my tongue across the shell of your ear, which was definitely begging for the tongue bath, before answering you. You groan and bite deep again into one of my pectorals and I moan this time sucking the tip into my mouth doing a little nibbling of my own that I feel makes your body shake so bad I'm scared your knees might not be able to keep us up.

Your knees apparently are encased in steel as you readjust our positions with your slick erection nudging against my entrance this time.

"Wait Sesshomaru you didn't let me tell you." You groan dropping your head heavily against my shoulder before nuzzling your nose and lips underneath my chin. I'm pleasantly surprised by how affectionate and touchy you're being. Making me believe even further the words you said in my room about hiding your love from me for my safety. Now that you can freely touch me and be with me at least in the house, you aren't hiding it, and I am extremely happy for that.

"Well you better tell me quickly then little brother I want terribly to be inside you…and I'm so close." You lick me underneath my chin then and your hot words mixed with that caress almost make me forget all about your mouth on my cock. I'm suddenly having other more distracting thoughts of tight fits and slick explosive releases that can only be found between two crashing bodies.

The water suddenly turns icy cold and without breaking us apart you quickly shut it off. But we don't leave the shower. My back has warmed the tiles behind it and you've grown quite comfortable with your hips nestled between my legs. Your erection is so close to where we both want it to be and our combined body heat more than makes up for the warmth lost by the cooling water.

"What do you want baby brother…tell me before its too late." You do a little hip swiveling of your own and I feel the natural slickness of your body rubbing against my entrance the head of you starting to slowly press into me. Teasing.

"I want your mouth on me…" I gasp out before it's too late and I've lost all want for your pretty mouth doing dirty things to a part of me I never thought it'd worship. I take your hand and guide it between our straining bodies and place it on the head of my swollen erection and tell you there. So there can be no confusion of where I want your soft lips to land.

"You're wish is my command outouto." You haven't called me that in years the name forgotten in the midst of all the emotional turmoil that your obsession for me had caused.

My head falls back against the tile and I groan at the feeling of you sliding down my body which practically hums in anticipation as your head gets closer and closer to my groin and straining cock.

You take one of my legs and throw it over your shoulder when you're fully kneeling in front of me opening me up to you as well as pushing my arousal closer to your mouth. When you close your eyes and open your mouth I can hardly watch as your lips open and part coming closer to where I need you most. My knees tremble and shake but you hold me up easily. And when your slick heat wraps around me I spurt a little into your mouth which wraps tighter around me wringing even more out of me. My knees go completely weak then your claws bite into my thigh muscles as your hands take over all of my weight. Your tongue swipes against the underside of me playing with the sensitized vein there with out taking my member out of your mouth. I can't help it when my hips take over and tunnel my flesh deeper into your mouth. Even though I am a hundred percent sure you have never done this for any body else before, you take all of me with ease and even hum a satisfied note when I hit the back your throat.

One hand sneaks away from holding me up by my thighs and starts playing with the heavy sacks underneath the flesh in your mouth carefully so you don't nick the thin skin with your claws.

Saliva slickens my shaft and I'm going crazy by the feel of your hard suctioning that wrings little mewls from my mouth that, just like the purring, I didn't know I was capable of making. It all feels so deliciously overwhelming that when you lift my leg a little higher and your mouth leaves my member I grab your hair and try to bring you back but you resist your hand replaces your mouth.

And then your tongue is licking at a place that has me heating up and squirming not only from pleasure but also embarrassment.

I can not believe that your mouth is _there _at the entrance into my body. Massaging the little pucker with your lips and tongue the added pressure from the hand on my cock makes my eyes cross. Feels so good.

"Sesshomaru…ngh…stop… please. I want…" But you don't stop.

You continue the onslaught even as you hum against me.

"Mmmm…what do you want? You know your big brother will do all that he can to give you whatever you need." Again I'm rendered speechless by the train wreck of pleasure that crashes into my gut. I'm tugging at your hair now to get you to stand but you won't budge.

"Please….want you in. _Sesshomaru_ I WANT YOU IN ME!" I can't help but scream it but I don't want to come with out the feeling of you thick inside me and your body all around me pressing me into the tile. Your body fighting to get as deep into mine as it can possibly go.

Everything stops as my words seem to sink into your skull as well as bounce around the tiles around us.

One moment you are in between my legs causing all sorts of madness, and then you are standing pressed against me lifting my legs back around your waist and nestling your body between mine. Right where it belonged pressed hotly against my obscenely slick entrance.

Your hand is back in my hair tilting my head back making our twin golden eyes meet at an angle. Yours are a deep orangey gold that is at the same time just as beautiful and even more so as a Japanese sunset. They are focused on mine with a determination I'm not really sure belongs in this setting as I don't know what's going through your head.

"Say you love me." My eyes do a little narrowing of there own at your words. If any one should be making demands on making the other declare there love it should be me. I don't say anything for a long time and you press your thick member into me. Slowly spreading me only letting the head and a little bit of the shaft in before stopping dead and holding my stare.

I gasp and grab tight to your big shoulders my hands tangle in your still slightly damp hair and I grab a handful at the base of your neck and tug.

"No. You say…. you love me." I manage to gasp out between lips that only want to moan and sigh. The feeling of you spreading me and not moving is making my brain turn to mush.

You grunt as I jerk your head back with your hair when you don't answer me teeth gritting at the tight feel of me around the head of your cock I'm guessing.

We both want you deeper.

It's killing us both this power play of love words.

You try to wrench your hair out of my hold mouth open and fangs bared as you resist. Making both of us suffer.

"Say it Inuyasha." I feel your buttocks clenching against the back of my heals and the result of which is your arousal sinking in just a little more deeper it almost makes me want to give in to you, just to have the feeling of you fully buried inside me. But I won't relent. Not after all the pain I went through from not knowing the truth of your feelings. But you always knew how I felt about you. I never hid them from you no matter how much I wanted to and tried. You always knew I loved only you. Even when we were with Koga you knew it was for you that I had him stay with us to help us through our finally coming together again after far too long.

I look into your eyes then while pushing my heels against the small of your back forcing you to go deeper even if you were trying to resist at the moment.

"You. Owe. Me." The look that flashes in your eyes lets me know I have you and when your head flops down against my shoulder I feel you kiss the side of my neck before the whispery sound of your voice hits my sensitive ears.

"I love you Inuyasha." I feel your warm palms on either side of my cheeks then spreading me wider as you spear inside of me. Tears prick my eyes from emotion and the slight pain of having you take me this way. You fill me up and stretch me wide a place here in your loving embrace I'm not afraid to be. My claws dig into your back deep drawing rivulets of blood that I wish I could reach to lap up as you start moving against me. Gently at first but we have been teasing each other for too long your control slowly then quickly snaps as our bodies crash into each others. My head bounces back against the tiles and the quick hard jarring of my body makes me afraid that I'm smacking some of them loose.

I hear as well as feel the connection of our bodies from the wet slapping sounds that ring out in the bathroom. The soft glow from the lights turns your usually alabaster skin into a sexy peachy color that contrasts against my darker complexion. I don't know why but that makes me even wilder as I hold on tight to you.

I latch onto you with tooth and nail biting you so hard the spicy taste of your blood blooms on my tongue the extra little sensation that sends my toes curling and my body spasming around yours.

My orgasm triggers your own and you spread my legs wider, my knees damn near hitting the tiles. My back is starting to ache from constantly hitting the hard tiles but that doesn't matter when wet heat splashes against the inner walls of my body trigger another orgasm from me. Your claws have dug underneath the skin in my thighs and your fangs…your fangs are buried in my throat.

"Mine." I hear you growl against that place that was a few minutes ago a regular forgettable patch of skin but now has been turned into a sacred place. A veritable shrine carved from flesh by the fangs of my lover…my mate.

I dig my hand in your hair and pull your head back. Your eyes have definitely bled into the crimson coloring of your baser side. Those ruby eyes are staring intensely at the mark on my throat your tongue that has definitely grown a couple of inches snakes out and licks my blood from off your elongated fangs and kiss swollen lips.

"Sesshomaru." I say and your newly reddened eyes snap to my face.

I look at you now this is as real as you will ever be. Your demon half taking over and showing all the possessiveness and love in those ruby eyes. Telling me without words that you truly love only me the declaration was now a bright red mark on the side of my neck that would soon scar over and never fully heal.

We are standing here in the cool shower our releases sticky on each other. Even though it has dawned on me that we have broken not only human law but now yokai law and that we had a bitch sized headache waiting for us when we walked out the bathroom. I can't remember a time where I was happier or more content with my self.

"Sesshomaru say you love me." Slowly your eyes fade back into their original color. Your head comes forward and you nuzzle me underneath my chin. Then you kiss the side of my neck where your claiming mark is still a little tender and sore laving it with your tongue trying to soothe the ache that won't go away until a few weeks from now.

"I thought I already did…"

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**17 Microsoft Word pages of nothing but smex! _**

***clears throat*... So here is the next chapter and thus more issues added to the Craptastic Misadventures of Inuyasha. Just want to say that I love comments. Comments are life I really want to know what you guys think about this one and I love comments of all types. It doesn't offend me if you guys offer constructive criticism to the way I'm portraying the characters or anything. I actually eat that shit up like no body's business. I'm just glad the chapter affected you enough to draw out any type of response which is what I'm going for so yeah let me know what's on your gray matter! Yeah...had to get that one one out so...Derp...see ya in the next chapter...if you don't hate me that is now that I've piled on the drama llama of the added complication yep...Love you guys!**

**Oh and like I said before there is fan art for this story and others the links can be found in my profile if you're interested.**

**Yeah...I done now.  
**

**~Angel**


	15. Lesser of Two Evils

"_I weave for you…__the marvelous web,"_

_-Bjork All Neon Like_

Chapter 15: Lesser of Two Evils

I couldn't stop looking at it the way the soft light reflected on my skin practically making it glow. You mated me. In the shower against the tiles, not exactly the ideal of a romantic marriage but it was real. The possession in your eyes as you stared at me, the sharp pierce of your fangs at my neck and the hard length of you inside me. I wouldn't change the way it happened for the world. I was yours finally and nothing on this earth could challenge that claim now. The shiny red scarring on my neck was the undeniable proof to that. Giddy and excited I find a hair tie lying on your dresser and put my hair into a high pony tail. Looking again in the mirror I put the strands in a bun I don't want anything to obstruct the view of my most precious mating mark. The sign of our love.

"Take your hair down Inuyasha." Your gruff voice coming from behind me makes me jump a little and the glow inside my heart fades at your words.

"Why?" I ask heart rate speeding up I don't want to hide it. I want every one to know. I want to scream it from the roof of our mansion like house.

Warm hands come around me and settle on my waist bringing my back against yours. You nuzzle your face in my hair playing with one of my ears with your lips before whispering.

"I don't want anyone to see it." My heart stops then my body becoming cold even though I am wrapped in your warm embrace.

I can't find my voice for a long time before blinking up into your twin golden eyes I manage to croak out.

"I thought you loved me? Don't you want every one to know?" Our eyes meet through the glass of the mirror. You are fully dressed in a maroon silk dress shirt and black slacks. The distance I feel is starting to come between us again symbolized in your fully dressed state and my naked one, I was still bare and unhidden from you while you were hidden from me once again. An odd tingling starts at my neck and my heart feels like it is getting squeezed in some type of medieval torture device. Who said emotions were harmless?

Your fingers gently touch your mark with before coming to your room I would have said with reverence, the calloused tips rubbing across the sensitive scarring making my body heat up and tingle.

"Isn't it enough that you will be sharing my bed every night from now on?" The hand that is still on my waist turns me in your arms and you kiss me on my nose before pulling the tie loose from my hair. As the long white tresses fall around my back and shoulders it hides our mark from view. It has never felt so heavy in my life.

The smile on your lips makes me angry as you turn and go sit at the edge of your bed bending over to put the loafers resting there on your silk clad feet. Silk on your feet you my dearest brother have always been well groomed and well dressed from the time I could start remembering our interactions together. As for me I've always been the wild child, rebelling against the rules the other aristocratic youkai adhered to. And I would rather walk around in a t-shirt and jeans with cotton socks on my feet. We have the same powerful demon blood surging in our veins where it has made you a master at composure and manipulation it has given me the freedom to roam wild and express my self as I may. Really hard to believe we were brothers. Really easy to see why we weren't supposed to be together.

Watching you do something so mundane while my feelings were in turmoil swirling inside me makes me want to scream. But instead I try and adopt some of that composure you seemed to have in spades.

"Why are you getting dressed?" The words come out clipped but the only sign of my loss of control over my emotions were the hands balled at my sides the claws pricking the skin there.

Without even looking up from your task you answer me.

"I'm going to see Kagura and her brother." At the blasé tone of your voice my fists tighten and the wetness I feel there tells me that I have pricked past the barrier of skin. I can't guess your emotions from your voice and the fringe of your bangs puts your face in a shadow, it's as if you are talking about the weather though and not about going to visit some ogress bitch of a female who wants you, my mate, for herself. A female who are father and this fucked up society we live in right now says is perfect for you.

"I'm going with you." I can't bare the thought of you going anywhere near her but as this mornings discussion replays in my mind I knew the meeting was bound to happen sooner or later. But I was going and I was going to tie my hair up to tight that not even a wisp of the offending stuff could sneak out and hide the mark on my neck. I won't let that woman win.

You stand then, straightening your clothes and hair while you go over to the enormous walk in closet.

"That won't be necessary." Your voice is muffled from inside the closet and I hear hangers clinking around as you look for something.

I'm left standing in the middle of your huge room body wrapped in nothing but a towel and shaking but not from the chill that was in the room. It's from the realization that you've gone back to the cold emotionless Sesshomaru. The brother who mated me with such passion in the shower is gone now. I am permanently bound to you with out the physical and mental capacity of leaving my mate for long periods of time. You no longer had to worry about me leaving you either by my own choice or someone else's.

Crisis averted.

My claws grow out as undiluted rage courses through my body bloodlust making me see red. But instead of sinking my claws into flesh I turn them on my self and chop off the offending long tresses of my hair that hide our mark. Blood staining the white hair like snow on a battle field. It falls to the black carpeted floor in a soft stringy puddle at my clawed feet. The sudden lack of weight makes me feel a little light headed but the anger soon shoves the disorienting feeling away.

"Inuyasha! _God dammit!"_ I hear more than see you run over to me and grab hold of my shoulders. You shake me once twice and the emotion I see contorting your face makes me see even more red. Why do you get to be angry?

"Inuyasha why? Why would you do this?" Your hands are hard against my triceps and I know there will be bruising there. Your face is so close to mine the desperation etched in your golden eyes gives me slight pause. It is as if I was falling down a great well and the short lifeline that was keeping me above the deadly depths has suddenly snapped, and you have no other way to save me from the plummet.

You've backed me up against your dresser the wood biting hard at the flesh of my lower back while your hands go from biting at my arms to cupping my face and running through my sheared hair. Tears are floating in your golden eyes. I push you off me then and watch as you fall ungracefully to the floor confused yet still angry.

"You were going to hide me! The only reason you put this mark on my neck was to bind me to you but never let anyone know. You bastard!" Anger has made my face heat up and I feel dizzy like I have a fever funny when I just cut off six inches of hair you would think I would be cold. You're face is just as mottled as mine as you stare up at me from the floor fangs bared in annoyance.

"You foolish, ignorant child! That is why I did not tell you anything before, stop thinking of only your emotions and feel Inuyasha really feel what my emotions are you should be able to do that with my mark on your neck!" I'm taken aback by how uncontrolled you are you're fangs have lengthened in your own anger and spit flies from your mouth as you are screaming up at me from the floor. With an arm braced behind your back you look down at me even though you are well below me.

"Think Inuyasha why would I want father to see that mark on your neck? Hmm? So he can just take you away from me? Move you somewhere where I can never get to you and put the merger with Kagura's family in jeopardy?" Slowly you start to get up hair falling over your face as you slowly regain your footing.

"Why would I say I loved you, mark you and then throw all that away?" A big hand swipes the long silver strands out of your face and hard golden eyes meet mine. The hurt in those amber eyes makes my chest tighten as I feel like a fool for my outbursts, but how could I have known all this? With the way you and father have been playing me positioning me like a chess piece for the ultimate attack on our opponents, how was I supposed to trust that you're actions were out of love and not another one of you're carefully planned maneuvers?

"Inuyasha I need you to trust me. Let me take care of everything." As you say this coming towards me I in my heart I want to, I truly do but everything that we've gone through has made it so extremely hard. Calming down I try to focus on your emotions I should be able to feel through the mark you left on my neck.

I feel anxiety, fear and soft warmth that must be your love for me.

I can feel it the warmth in your own chest that usually engulfs mine when ever I'm around you. I hold on to that warmth. Before you can get all the way over to me I close the short distance between us by running at you and throwing my arms around your big silky shoulders. You loose your balance and we both fall to the floor I hear your breath come out of you in a woosh of air.

"I'm sorry _I'msorryI'msosorry_!" My cheek slips against the cool fabric covering your chest as the words jumble together tripping off my tongue while my arms wind around your neck so tight it's probably cutting off your air supply. But I don't want to let you go yet the thought of you going to Kagura thinking that maybe the bite on my neck was just another one of your schemes. It was all a little too much to bare I needed the feel of you. Your big hands come around and land warmly on my naked back sliding up and down then making soothing patterns with your fingers.

"I know Inuyasha," you say your voice apparently unencumbered by the hold my arms had around your neck, "but I'm going to need you to try harder. This is a delicate situation I have landed us in and I need you to listen to everything I say." One of your hands slides lower and across one of my ass cheeks while the other comes under my chin tilting my head in a way that wouldn't be awkward for us to make eye contact.

"Ok?" Your eyes are searching my face almost pleading with me as they did the other night, to forgive you and trust you as I used to.

My eyes meet yours searching as well for the love that I feel soft and warm through our mark. I wanted to see it reflected in your eyes and when finally I seemed to find it I nod as much as I can with your hand restraining me head.

You seem pleased and those eyes truly spark the golden glow becoming as brilliant as the sun as you lean forward and our lips meet.

With the soft pillows of your mouth massaging against mine I become more aware of the hand on my ass that I can now feel kneading and squeezing at the globe there. I smile against your lips and arch my back against that hand. The hiss that escapes from your mouth from my stomach rubbing against your erection has me smiling against your lips.

"Careful Inuyasha we do not have much time before I have to leave." The fingers of your hand have reached very closely near my entrance a few strong digits sliding through the crease and teasing the crimp there, making me do a little hissing of my own.

"Well then I suggest you hurry 'cause I still have to get dressed so you can take me with you." All at once everything stops and you push your self up so you can fully look into my eyes.

"Inuyasha even if I had intended to take you with me I can't now because of what you have done to yourself." My brows furrow but I try this time not to get angry.

"I can where a turtle neck." One of your own brows arches in skepticism.

"In the spring?" I start to get up then cause it was rather apparent you weren't going to continue touching me and I needed to start getting dressed.

"It's still a little cool outside." I turn to the mirror then and wince at my reflection. My claws weren't exactly the best tools to use to cut off my hair the ends looked haggard and uneven. I see you shaking your head in the refection and hear you sigh as you get up from the floor as well.

"Inuyasha I cannot take you with me." The look of regret on your face keeps me from getting even angrier. I understand that certain things cannot be revealed our mating for one thing but I do not want to be left in the house alone while you and father go hash it out with the Evil Twins. This time I'm the one who walks towards you and back you up against the bed. You sit and open your arms to me while I settle upon your lap embracing your face in my hands.

"Inuyasha…" I know what you are going to say but I cut you off with a kiss. Something short and sweet, we have a meeting to go to after all.

"Look I know you're not hiding me and that you don't want me to cause a scene. But we're mates now. I don't want to go through what we did before it's been proven that when you start thinking for me your good intentions turn to shit."

"But-" Before you can interrupt me any further I give your lips another quick kiss which makes your eyes smolder a little bit.

"Lets do this together this time." Sitting there while holding your strong face in my hands I watch you process my words and as they sink in you shake your head and sigh making the long length of your hair brush against my thighs.

A sudden burst of joy the likes of which I haven't felt since after you placed this mark on my neck goes through me as I realize I'm going to the meeting with you and that the problem of the bitch ogress and her brother wouldn't be solved without me.

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**So I managed to bang chapter 15 out huzah! And it only took...like a month! Thanks you guys for hanging in there with me and an especially BIG thank you to those of you who have commented again I love it when you guys tell me what you think of the chapters! Well see you in the next chapter!**

**Angel  
**


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